palm springs cont...

so much fun!!!

we just got back about an hour or so ago from our fun weekend in palm springs!

we stayed at the Caliente Tropics Resort (caliente means hot in spanish just so u know) for 2 nights, and mostly we layed out and went swimming. then we'd also go in the room and watch movies and take a break from the heat for awhile...it wasnt super duper hot, but during the peak heat hours of the day unless u were in the pool u werent comfortable. otherwise it was nice! kelsey made us yummy meals, and we also went out for mexican food and strolled the town for awhile last night. then today we got up and packed the car up, layed out awhile more, went to stein mart (where i got shoes for olivias wedding! yay!) cause we had never been and their was one right by our hotel, and then we went to see the giant dinosaurs in Cabazon! just like pee wee herman! so fun! we visited them and annie saw a guy who looked like her ex boyfriend. and then we ate in the diner and it was yummy and kinda silly.

i already miss the girls. i wish we had money and no school so we could have stayed another night, that would have been perfect. and that annie wasnt sick during the time. that was a bummer, but she felt good a lot of the time also so it wasnt all bad.

so im going to post some pictures for ur viewing pleasure!

lovelove.

here we are on our way out! i know im weird thanks.

the rest of them i dont feel like putting comments telling u what they are. u can figure it out.

PALM SPRINGS 2007

weeeellll...
currently we're in palm springs!!!
im taking lots of pictures to post when i come home (i didnt bring the cord)
and we're so cute and fun at this old 60's motel.
lots of stars have stayed here and theirs all kinds of people here. so fun!

we got up and layed out for a few hours, then it got really hot and annies not feeling well, so we decided to come inside for awhile. curently we're watching Notting Hill on tv and some are eating lunch and others are not (me) cause im not hungry yet.

ive been drinking.

im a little drunk. my lips are numb. not to bad tho, still coherant.

this movie is amazing. but we're all single so its a little depressing.

hers some pictures of us i just took!!!


soooo i woke up early and was bored

yeah. and i looked cute so i kept going

me and kelsey like 5min ago, woot.

thats out our window this morn. its so pretty! bright blue cloud sky and mountains surrouding us! amazing!

view from me. we're just really fun.

WE'RE SUCH FUN! UR SO JEALOUS WE'RE FRIENDS!

often i wish i was someone else so i could be friends with us.

the time is now the walrus said!!!

TO GO TO PALM SPRINGS!!!

so im at freaking work until 4pm...1 more hour...
and then i rush to target to get some new sunglasses and diet coke
and then rush home to finish packing
and then we gooooooooooooooooooooooooo

good news!
cut boy in my lit and psyc class talked to me yesterday for like 10minutes! annnd he was totally trying to talk to me like he was interested in my life...not just random stuff or whatever. i only realized later how exciting it was!
and today fedex guy came by, hes so cute and nice...but im wondering if all fedex guys are so friendly and flirty like that...im getting the feeling they are.
note to self: never marry a fedex/ups guy...damn

next week is going to be horrible. i have so much to do its kinda frightening. hence why this weekend has to be amazing! prep for the hell to come...

i stole someones food out of the fridge today. i feel kinda bad, but it was just a burrito in a big box of cosco size box ones. and it was organic with no meat! i couldnt resist! but also, we're supposed to throw away stuff with no names on it, and the box didnt have a name soooooo...
maybe i should replace it. this reminds me of when that guy kept stealing ross's sandwich at the museum office and ross FREAKED out. i dont want someone to get mad.

i miss movies, i havent gotten to watch any all week.

i brought math homework to do, but id rather kill myself so i voted "no" on doing it. id rather sit here and do nothing obviously.

u know those little needles that grow on palm trees? one time i got 3 of them poked thru the webbing in between my fingers. i was rollar blading or something and put my hands out on the tree to try and stop myself. it hurt like a bitch. i think i was 12. i just rmemebered that cause out the window theirs a bunch of them and they look very forboding. i think if we're stranded on an island, i would use them to sew things...and use plant strings for thread. id be very resourceful.

speaking of islands, i watched LOST the other night and it was so good. but i have no one to talk to about it cause ive been to busy. this jacob thing/fellow is weird and kinda annoys me cause as they're revealing secrets of the island, they are less cool then the ones i came up with. or are they?!

i want a diet coke so bad. but i only have a 10$ bill and i dont want all that change. maybe i should scrounge around for some change in the bottom of my purse. cause i want it real bad. and its tea time.

i think im graduating with my AA in 2 weeks.kinda exciting right.

this will make u laugh a lot.

survey to beat my wednesday blues

sooooo i go to palm springs this weekend if u havent noticed. its pretty much going to be the best time of my life, thanks.

in celebration!

Body: Write exactly what's on your mind and don't change it.

1. My 'ex' is still= pretty, but not the one for me

2. I am listening to= kyxy 96.5 at work...its commercials tho

3. Maybe I should= quit picking my nails cause the left hand is ugly

4. I love= pink pens, i just got one and it makes me really happy

6. I don't understand= how fish breathe underwater

7. I lost my respect for= jessica simpson. hehe

8. I last ate= a chicken bake from costco. too much cheese. and it had bacon and was really upsetting. now my tummy hates me

9. The meaning of my display name is= my name, pretty clever huh

10. Love is= so fun! but also pretty heartbreaking

11. Someday= i have a new hybrid

12. I will always= have a dog, when i dont, u will know i am sad without one cause i love dogs so much

13. Love seems to be= misunderstood by our generation

14. I never ever want to lose= my friends, i love them

15. Myspace is= GREAT for keeping up with all my friends who live around the world

16. When I woke up this morning= i wanted to kill myself cause i was so tired

17. I get annoyed with= my boss who forgets things and then blames me

18. Parties= AMAZING with the vpdq. pretty much the best times in my life

19. My pet[s]= are wonderful, i am in love with them. Bella and Lola, basically my house is a sirority.

20. Kisses= aww i miss them...lets see, its been 3 years...sigh

21. Today I= woke up at the crack to get to work for 730am, came here to work, took my lunch going to cosco getting my eye exam and new contacts, now im here...have school later...art homework...bed

22. I wish= i was already graduated from school, i hate it and i have 2 more years and even then i dunno if ill get to do what i want to do. sucks. i also wish i had lots of money to go on trips and buy a new car and move out. sucks

23. I really want= to move out with annie and send for cammie to come and live with us and i get him a good job. a new car. free flights so i can take mission trips galore. find boyfriendc, hes apparently lost

PRESENTLY-
01. is your hair wet?: thatd be weird
02. is your cell phone right by you?: yeah
03. do you miss someone?: always
04. are you wearing chap stick?: yeah! howd u know?!
05. are you tired?: yeah, not to bad tho
07. are you watching tv?: no, im at work
08. are you wearing pajamas?: no, see above.

HAVE YOU-
01. recently done anything you regret?: no, i dont think so
02. ever lied?: no im perfect
03. ever kicked someone?: not meanly, just joking around. imnot abusive ok!
04. ever tripped over your own feet?: story of my life!

TODAY-
01. have you cursed?: no

02. have you yelled at someone?: i was realizing that i dont really yell (aggresivly)...weird huh

03. have you gotten mad at someone?: i got a little irrate with my boss for forgetting and blaming me, but im over it. thats just how he is.

RANDOM-
Q: is there a person who is on your mind right now?: annie cause this was her survey

Q: do you have any siblings?: brother

Q: do you want children?: as many as i can find

Q: do you smile often? yeah, most of the day

Q: do you wish on stars?: no, usually i just end up praying

Q: do you untie your shoes every time you take them off?: haha yeah right, i hate shoes...all i wear are sandals or heels or flats. shoes can suck it

Q: do you like your handwriting?: yeah, but sometimes i think it looks like a little kids, teehee

Q: are you a friendly person?: do people answer "no" to this? do people think they're unfriendly? thats a better question

Q: who's bed did you sleep in last night?: like ull ever know

Q: what size ring do you wear?: large and incharge.

Q what color shirt are you wearing?: black and a green sveter that shows of my boobs

Q: do you have any pets?: didnt we already go over this? 2 dogs, now leave me alone!

Q: what were you doing at 7pm yesterday?: being stressed out

Q: I can't wait until: THIS WEEKEND IS PALM SPRINGS

Q: Is tom on your friends list?: maybe, i dont know

Q: ever cried on your friend's shoulder?: yeah, its kinda awkward so i try not to do it often

new rule

people arent allowed to post things about being done with school/only having one midterm left/ect.

i mean, whats the point really?

and i dont mean on ur own personal blog, i mean on like a myspace bullitin or a facebook current status thing...

it just makes certain people jealous of u.

and its not really a conversation starter like gushing about a trip ur taking or how ur getting married or something like those things are.

its just u bragging, and what did Jesus say about bragging? he said u die, so ha.

so now let me tell u how i only have 3 weeks left of school, one of those weeks is just finals, and one of those weeks is this week which is about half over.

im going to palm springs this weekend with 3 of my best girls, and it will probably be the best time of our life. im going to proudly drink my troubles away, because i have a lot of them and im not ashamed.

india is to stressful and i dont wanna go anymore.

my dogs are really really really cute, and i wish i was allowed to take them everywhere i go.

its really hot out. yesterday annnd today. the fan in my room is shit so i need to buy a legit one. i had to sleep with the window open, which i never do cause im such a light sleeper and the window faces the street and i cant sleep with anything open or any light coming in. so i slept with headphones, but the dogs kept waking up and barking cause of the noises outside and it sucked.

i should go to starbucks and get a soy latte.

soooo im allergic to milk, not soy. so why do iced venti, soy, chai lattes, no ice...make me so sick? weird right. it tastes like cake, so good. i quit drinking them for a looong time cause they made me sick...but i had one last thursday when i wished i was dead from such a long day of school...and now my taste buds are awakened! however, 4$ for a drink is kinda crazy...maybe ill reserve it for when im with kels;)

palm springs is going to be in the low 80's this weekend. peeeerfect for sun bathing all day long.

my lit teacher still hasnt told us what our final is going to be. hes so weird.

ok, that is all.

boy crazy

soooo its happening again, ive been getting all boy crazy all the time.

im praying Jesus heals my heart cause im lonely and its annoying.

i dont want to just want to be around boys cause i want a bf, but i need to be around boys more for just some good ol healthy male attention.

so its a mixture of both.

Jesus, fill me up. help me to only want you and want more and more of you.

boys im all twitterpated about:
aaron weiss from mewithoutyou

declan bennett who played "roger" in RENT annnd is british annnd plays guitar and sings

a friend of a friend who lives in canada who i met on facebook (i know)

quite a few other friends who just need to get a few things together in their life and then id marry them, seriously. (prob like 4 guys, i know)

random guy in my lit class and psyc class

fedex guy who comes into work

finally thats all.
this is getting ridiculous.

ugh

guess where i went!

and had front row center seats for 20$

and it was my first time

seeing the broadway tour of RENT

AMAZING.

the movie sucks in comparison, and i loved the movie so thats saying a lot about the play

and the music director guy looked like X and he even played the piano like it was his job! well, it was...

ive been like on this high since the show, and kinda emotionally sad thats it over cause i thought me and "roger" and "mark" and the guy who looked like X became friends, and then the shows over and im kinda confused as to when we're gonna hang out again.

and then i remember ive never actually met them.

and the boys were real pretty, and i wanted to hang out with "Roger" (whos real name is declan and hes british, sigh) so i stalked him on myspace (cause hes very 'serious' about his music) and now we're friends, he even posted me a comment...except it was just about his itunes music so i dunno if that counts...

however, being in the front row with a lil cleavage did get me some eye contacts, so maybe we made out secretly in our eyes...

your eyes

and were almost done with school!!!
and im going to India for 2 months!
i leave june 16th ish!
and im going to cal state in the fall!

and i have a real legit blog that i post on, so u should go there and bookmark it cause ur really interested in my life.
esthermkerr.blogspot.com

PS: theirs weird people who follow the show around and were waiting for the 20$ tickets since 6am and had like a campsite and blue hair and were weird. just thought u should know. im not that crazy

days

so all my days definitly run together.
its tuesday and i keep thinking its thursday or something...
i keep thinking the weekend is real soon and the week is over.
i left cassie a comment on myspace about how her midterms went, and then realized that its only tuesday.
i wanted to call kelsey and see if she got the job, but its only 1030am
maybe its cause its still early.
hmm.

so the hell that typically comes with the mid point and end of the school year is finally here! huzzah! but actually, its not going to be THAT bad...at least, not as bad as past semesters. i just wrote everything i have left to do by class, and it was boring so i deleted it.

i dont like getting up early, my body gets so angry. alllll week i look forward to the days were i get to sleep until 8 or 9am...or better yet, for as long as i want. they are far and few between, and i get mad when i have to random plans on those days and have to get up to an alarm clock. its silly, but true. i like the night life, i like to boogie.

sooooo im procrastinating writing my paper for literature...i realllly dont like writing papers, ive written so many in the last 3 years i think i could consolidate them into a book and itd be legit.

palm springs!!! when im grumpy and hate school, it only means ive forgotten about palm springs!!! yay! this weekend we have kels graduation...and next weekend we have fun!

i have to drive up to santa ana to get shots done for my trip. i need both hepititus A and B, typhoid pills, and maybe a few other boosters. can we reflect on how im going to be in india for 2 months! thats such a long time. just the amount of toiletries i have to bring is crazy...i need to look into if they have things like shampoo and such there...cause last i checked, they only had weird kind. but we didnt really go into grocery-like stores very often so i dunno.

my cousin is staying in my room for the summer while im gone again.

today i have hair like Hermione. all big and kinda bushy. but hot, not weird.

ok thats enough rambling, i should probably start this fricken essay...bleh.

i just wanna go to india and teach babies art and then bring some home, is that to much to ask?

im going to india.

im going to india.im going to india.im going to india.im going to india.im going to india.im going to india.im going to india.im going to india.im going to india.im going to india.im going to india.im going to india.im going to india.im going to india.im going to india.im going to india.im going to india.im going to india.im going to india.

death

school

ive been here 8 hours and i have 4 more to go

i still have to study for a test and take a test

and tomorrow get up at the crack and go to work where i really should start work on my lit paper

im trying to tell myself only a month left

im not sure i can pull through

they put this much stress on us on purpose

so we die

i thought i could handle it

but im starting to fade

im dying kids

im dying

*collapses on the couch in the student center*

i want

this. real bad. but its to much money when babies are starving. so we'll just look at it awhile.


today i half day off cause i only had class at night, but i ended up having to write a paper, then lit homework, plus the class. it sucked. i still have more psyc tomorrow.

i failed my math test, and i very well may fail the class unless the teacher has mercy on me and i kick for this last unit on statistics and the final.

me and lola are watching LOST now, i miss annie.

a lot of things are happening in my life. im graduating with my AA this May, going to India for like 3 months, and starting a new school in the fall.
im crazy.

ooo juliets taking sun into the weird hospital thingie...this show kicks...im nervous tho...wheres annie...creept blinking neon lights...i never know if juliets lying or not...

ok, thats all for today.

even things u didnt want to know

im soooo bored. but tired from school and homework so i have no brain power to do anything else productive. parents are hogging the tv. to early for bed.

wheres annie.

-------------


i got this from a 15 year old.
i thought it would answer all those questions uve been dying to ask me.


-Prologue-

1. Who took your default pic?
micah in the disneyland bathroom...i cut her out:(

2. Exactly what are you wearing right now?
brown soft pants. "save" darfur" shirt. glasses. bra. thats all. basically, pajamas

3. What is your current problem?
money for outreach. and passing certain classes

4. What makes you most happy?
all my girls together. my dogs. sleeping. traveling. music. Jesus.

5. What's the name of the song that you're listening to?
amy winehouse-"back to black"

7. Do you like MTV?
i missed that phase. that channel REALLY irritates me actually.

Chapter 1

1. Nickname(s):
effer, effski, gaga, ef, hatti (in India)

2. Eye color?
blue like the sky

........................................................................................................

Chapter 2:
FAMILY

1. Do you live with your parent(s)
yes...its tiring...

2. Do you get along with your parent(s)?
usually...we have our moments

3. Are your parents married/separated/divorced?
married

4. Do you have any Siblings?
brother

-------------------------------------------------------------------

Chapter 3:
FAVORITE

1. Ice Cream:
soy cookies and cream, or if im gonna induce pain on myself i go for ben and jerrys oatmeal cookie.

2. season?
autumn

3.Color(s):
pink black teal

--------------------------------------------------------------------

Chapter 4:
DO YOU-

1. Write on your hand?
i try not to, it takes forever to come off...but yeah. it currently says 23degreesC, which is what a website said the temp in india is...

2. Call people back?
i try to, i suck at it.

4. Sleep on a certain side of the bed?
the right. the doggies get the other side.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Chapter 5:
Have You...

1. Broken a bone?
no ones suprised no

3. Had physical therapy?
no

4. Gotten stitches?
no gross

5. Taken painkillers?
of course, im a girl

7. Been stung by a bee?
once, trevor had to help me...it was weird

8. Thrown up at a doctors office?
ew no

9. Sworn in front of your parents?
haha yeah...now that im old its not weird...they do it more then me

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Chapter 6:
Who/what was the last:

1. Movie you saw in the movie theatres?
the namesake. cassie burfday! so good!

2. Person to text you?
kelsey. about work

3. Person who called you?
dawn. about outreach!

4. Person to tackle you?
i havent been tackled in ages

5. Thing you touched?
obviously the key board...before that, the sink to wash my hands

6. Thing you ate?
really good pizza

7. Thing you said?
"ok im going back to my life now" leaving my parents downstairs

8. Had a detention?
yeah, this is for highschoolers

some things i love

my doggies. a lot.
mom is finally potty training Lola for real, so now she doesnt irritate me all the time.

movies. a lot.
u just learn so much, and get to escape reality for awhile. perfect for cudding!

Jesus. a lot.
sometimes im so overwhelmed by all He has done for me and continues to do for me everyday. im so thankful for being freeeee!!!

sleeping. too much.
i could seriously sleep all day.

harry potter audio books.
dare i say more?

disneyland.
makes ur insides burst with happiness just from the energy of walking into a place! let alone riding rides and eating crap food shaped like a mouse!

traveling.
im already making packing lists in my head for india and its like 2 monthes away. palm springs in like 3 weeks!!!

my job as the receptionist.
weird huh, but i really like it. im the office MANAGER, im in charge of everything! so fun! i just get to organize all day!

babies/kids.
i want some of my own so bad. but until then, i just love watching them play and learn and be so friggen cute. i cant wait to be a mommy. i cant wait to be a teacher!

india.
so excited!!! its more magical then disneyland.

ok, i just wanted to be optomistic in a blog for once, and im excited about these things but i forgot that God has blessed me with them so i need reminders to myself.

art show this friday at church! a special speaker speaking on the role of arts in a post modern world. free snacks and coffee! im really excited! i wish i didnt have night classes every night of the week, otherwise id totally join the art group there. i just love Jesus and i love art.

and i love sleeping, goodnight irene!

monday

have i ever mentioned how much i dislike school? HATE is a good word.

seriously, math is the hardest thing for me. and i cant focus on anything, and im oversensative to authority figures so i dont like asking for help, and it exhausts me to work so hard at focusing all day. its awful.

i do really like my child psycology class. even tho she assigns us way to many projects, and the class is thursday nights for 3 hours...i learn so much and i really like it. its encouraging that ive chosen the right major...kinda...
liberal studies. and a depth of study in art & aducation
what does one take for liberal studies?

hopefully no more math. i wont be able to pass it.

in other news, ill be going to India this summer! im trying not to get to excited since my ticket isnt officially bought yet. but yay! ill be in the north east part for about 7 weeks, and then hopefully flying down to Bangalore to see all my dear ones there for about 2 weeks there. and then home...just a few days before my new school, and a week before olivias wedding!

its all happening!

i have to get hepititus shots. malaria pills. anti diharrial pills, so i dont die like last time...ugh. a visa. travel insurance. so much to do.

if ud like to support me in my big huge mission trip, it would be much appreciated. everything costs money! but its well worth it. every little bit helps!

we're going to be pioneering an entirely new ministry in this area of India! itll be very relational with college age students at the universities in the area! i think we'll also be helping them with their first DTS at the base...encouraging the christians already there, ect.
amazing!

my dream life:
finish school and teach art at a cute private school for a little while.
help mummy in india get her ministry supported if needed.
live simply while working and save money for summers doing art evangelism around the world.
marry a pediatrician.
continue summers off doing ministry with him doing medical ministry and me teaching art to little ones.
adopt my babies from all over the world.
teach in the sunday school locally.
raise my babies and live happily ever after.

amazing!

ok, now im going to try and study for the math test im going to fail. awesome.

today

i woke up at the crack of dawn and convinced myself to go to class despite being o so tired (dont know why, i went to bed at like 1030)

my lit teacher read us 2 poems, we clearly upset about the virgina tech shooting, and told us we could go home. my next class was art, and it was 4 hours later, so i peaced out.

i went to jimbos and bought groceries.

came home and ate a yummy delicious organic banana.

threw it up.

i still dont know why.

slept for like 3 hours.

did homework.

now im watching american idol and waiting for annie to come home so we can watch Harry Potter 4!!! marathon on fox family, we watch one each night, so fun.

palm springs with the girls in one month!!!
parents home in a few days!
lolas not having so many accidents in the house now!

watched the royal tenebaums today, reminded me of old summers with machu cord trev cass and annie and even that ex boy...high school...sigh.

i love wes anderson.

all my love.
esther

cassies 21st birthday!

so yesterday we went to irvine to meet kelsey 1/2 way, to celebrate cassies 21st birthday!

we went to the cheesecake factory and then to see the Namesake...o right, i already wrote about what we were going to do in the last blog...ok...well attached are some pictures. enjoy. we're fun and we were happy.

THINGS THAT HAPPEN WHEN I LEAVE ANNIE HOME ALONE:
1) organizes the towel cupboard
2) cleans the entire house in preperation for people coming a week later cause she read the calendar wrong.
3) skims the entire pool and jumps in in the middle of winter
4) does all the laundry in the house
5) glues colored hole punch outs to my dogs ears
6) watches alice in wonderland or harry potter in her easter dress
7) locks herself in the backyard and has to climb in thru the doggie door, injuring her back
8) lola pees on her feet

this is why we need to live together.
i will miss her a lot when the parents come home.


hot friends


me and kelsey!


lovely ladies


cassies first legal drink!



so cute!



the best.ever.

this made me laugh a lot

last night i ended up having to stay over in Julian, but it wasnt such a sad thing, i love staying there! i slept better then i have in a long time...i was sooooo tired and its so quiet there and i got to stay in the bed i always stay in, and didnt have to get up a billion times cause the dogs are stupid. so twas nice.

i got home around 11am and took a shower and then went straight to bed until like 430pm. i was having an allergy attack and slept o so good.

then me and micah went to say bye bye to tisha kitty whos moving to apple valley...it was very saddening, but also a good thing for her life.

then micah and me went to get sushi and see Aqua Teen Hunger Force. it was pretty funny, to long tho. we had a nice time.

now me and micah and annie are watching harry potter and on our Apples. we're fun.

tomorrow is going to be SO FUN! its cassies 21st birthday!
me and annie and cass are going up to irvine to meet kelsey for lunch at the cheesecake factory, and then to see the movie The Namesake, which is about India so im very excited. im really looking forward to our fun day!

and now a comic for ur amusement...it made me laugh and laugh and laugh.

all my love dear ones.

REDEMPTION SONG

so these past few days ive been really reflecting on everything my God has done for me. Even if you dont believe in God, you cant argue with MY LIFE.

within the last few years, i was on so many medications for anxiety, depression, ADD, stomach pills (cause of stress i was getting an ulcer), it was ridiculous. i was fearful and worried and tired and overwhelmed and frustrated and all i wanted to do was either drink, watch tv, or sleep, just to get away from it all.

God called me perfect and wonderful. he literally, brought me out of darkness and death. "i was lost, but now im found." is so true for me. He loves me perfectly, all He wants for me is to BE WHO I AM, which is BELOVED. He healed my deepest darkest wounds and cried with me as i told Him my hurts.

we are now children of the marvelous light.

how can i go on living anyway but praising my Lord for literally saving me from darkness.

ive been redeemed. and im shouting it from the rooftops. cause u can to.

needless to say, God worked with me to get me off all my anxiety and depression and stomach meds. ADD is still a legit problem i have, but i dont need to take the meds very often, and i probably wont at all when im done with school. im not saying God does this for everyone, or that i wont ever relapse. everyones different, God often works thru meds and doctors and counseling...i recommend those things to a lot of people actually, but the point is that God desires u to be perfect. so when i worry about passing my mental issues onto my future children someday...i can rest assured that God can and desires to redeem anyone whos ready to live freely. it just may look different for each person.

go and be free little ones. He has called us into the marvelous light!

*side note*
my mental and physical health is also why i care so much about organic and all natural foods and products. its scienticly proven that all the crap in the air and food affects mental and physical health. more importantly, i believe God is calling us to a higher level of taking care of ourselves. He made our bodies and He made perfect foods for us to eat to keep them in top working order! why arent Christians the healthiest people in the world?! furthermore, why dont we strive to take care of the earth He gave us?

we're getting better.

im not perfect. obviously. i screw up all the time. but im trying.

ok, thats my soapbox about my Lord and true savior.

next time ill just write about skimmping gophers out of the pool and watering the lawn with bowls of water.

its all happening.
all my love dear ones.

im certainly not perfectly healthy either, but ive made HUGE progress in the last year or so. isnt it amazing that God takes steps with us a little everyday? He loves us so perfectly that its never overwhelming. i need to remember those things.

and now, somethings that made me laugh out loud at work, especially the last one. enjoy.

just a few things about my life...

yesterday me and annie found a dead gopher in our pool with poop coming out of its butt and its mouth open and annie was brave and scooped it out

our gardener told us to water the lawn, but the hose wouldnt work, so we used plastic cooking bowls and filled them with water from the kitchen and threw the water on the lawn that way...when we realized it would take forever, annie decided the backyard hose would go all the way to the front

im going to julian tomm night for a rehearsal for a podcast play im in. ill tell u when it airs.

ive recently discovered that during my 3 hr breaks in between class, i can cruise down to the B&N and get a soy latte and read books there, or magazines, or do my own HW (has yet to happen, thats why its a break!). so far ive bought 2 vegan cookbooks (im not entirely vegan, they eat a lot of fake products im not to crazy about, i can explain more about that crap later if u want). today at my B&N break i read/skimmed "psychology today" and a book about ADD. also a book about india. some dog training books. im fun huh.

now i have child psycology. i really like the class but its only once a week for 3 hours, which is to long for any class. arrrrg.

me and annie are having so much fun, i dont know what im going to do when she goes back home.

my stupid dog wont get potty trained. the least shes gone in the house since we got her is 2x a day. i need to call the dog whisperer.

im going to learn to cook. hence the vegan cooking books. im excited. i need my mom home tho to help me with getting ingrediants and meal planning, ect.

i miss my parents, but i dont miss living with them.

i need to move out. stupid dependency and dogs...arg.

finally i got new music, and its making the week so much better.

why hasnt anyone ever shown me "Of Montreal" im in love!

gotta go to class.

all my love dear ones.

easter and LA!!! spring break 2007!!!

but i don wanna go back to school...

soooo im avoiding writing my stupid literature essay cause im in denial of going back to school. bleeeeh...

GOOD THINGS
got my graduation from comm college info yesterday. ill be done forever there on may 25th!!! im so excited! then just 2 more years and im totally done...kinda...

LA was such fun! it had some moments where i wished i was home, but most of the moments i was glad to be out of sd and with micah ficah having adventures. we stayed with her friend jaime, and it was nice to be with a boy for once. i miss members of the male species. just as normal friends and stuff. arg. ill try and post pics soon...

easter is tomorrow and its my favorite holiday. to bad parents are in europe and im all alone. haha not really. me and annie are going to make a big easter dinner and go to the amazing night service at calvary and be fun. its an open invite too, so maybe other people will end up coming too!

my outreach stuff for the summer is kinda coming together. im frustrated cause i feel like nobody wants me to go...like everyones all cranky about it...and i am to so i need encouragement, not discouragement...ya know? the outreach isnt really anything that God spoke to me about doing for the outreach...like nothing at all actually. but its still coming together so we'll see what happens. i hate how YWAM does everything at the last minute, its so frustrating. if nothing else, id like to go to bangalore again and see the LMC there...i love it there and i miss everyone so much.

i went to maldys bday part last saturday night (week ago) and it was the best night of my life. i saw allll the vpdq people i love and felt loved back cause sometimes i think they're all so self centered and insecure that they cant feel affection for anyone...but i was wrong kinda. and i had lots of dietcoke and vanilla vodka so i was happy happy too. i smoked to many capris tho, and i decided that im over smoking forever and im not even going to keep any on me for when i drink...cause thats really the only time i smoke. its just so bad for u...esp when i make so many other organic and healthy type choices...its just silly.

having annie here is fun, im going to miss her a lot when my parents come home and she goes back to middle-of-nowhere clairemont.

nice to have kelsey home too...but shes real sick which is sad. shes been sick soooo long is awful.

my diet is going well and its not to difficult. i like it.

NOT SO GOOD THINGS
kelseys going home and cassie is back in school

school starts monday and work and im over it. i just have to much going on, i dont know how ive done it for so long.

its all cloudy out so no getting a tan yesterday or today

lolas been pooping and peeing inside everyday all over the house, ive been so frustrated. but shes doing better today! its 530pm and so far nothing inside! yay!

i have this f-ing essay to write and id rather die!!!

ok, here i go again on my own...

come to my easter dinner! so fun! u can come to church if u want to also, but u dont want too.

email/call me for more info.

all my love dear ones.

heres a picture of me and micah in the disneyland hotel bathroom.



sometimes u wish u were our friend huh