Friday, October 24, 2008

always tired on a Friday

sorry i havent been updating my lil bloggy blog dear friends. i havent had much to report, just busy with school heating up, my small school student teaching, and still working at the office on fridays. i have some fun plans this and next weekend, so thats fun...but otherwise, nothing exciting or new really.
tomorrow we all get dressed up "foxy" and go rollar skating for Jordans 22nd birthday! hooray! sunday me and mom and other mother daughters from her book club are going to see the secret life of bees and then i think im going to pumpkin carve at Alyssas house. (YAY!)

next weekend is halloween events! friday we're having a little work party here for lunch (free food! yay!) and then me and annie will be dressing up (of course i cant tell u! thatd ruin the suprise!) and going to the Surf n Saddle for a lil drink and to mingle with the local drunks in costume...then im going to hit up my old vpdq friends and crash the party i wasnt really invited too but saw the post that said "everyones invited" so i assume that includes, they dont care and i know they would love to see me so ha. saturday night is Allis HUGE party which im still undecided about, its a little overwhelming to attend a party with a billion people i know like 5 people there. so well see.

ok, im trying to get the energy to do my homework so im going to do this survey. plus, its my blog so i cant do what i want!

Do you bump into someo​nes arm if you want to hold their​ hand?​​​
i think thatd be very improper for a lady to do. however, i wouldnt be opposed if a date tried it, hehe

Last argum​ent?​​​
last real argument with yelling and tears was with cassie in Switzerland. i was sick and not in the mood to deal with issues she was trying to help me work on. it was actually really funny because 2 people staying in the hostel were down the stairs listening to the entire thing, so funny!

You hugge​d?​​
kelsey. shes one of the best huggers! except i wasnt wearing a bra and she wasnt very happy about that.

You cried​ with?​​​

Reaso​n for the last tear shed?​​​
i miss community and small groups and accountability and even large group services. im VERY frustrated and keep getting doors shut in my face when i try. grr!

Someo​ne who means​ a great​ deal to you?
so many people can fill this spot. we'll say Cammie for now. he was lost but now hes found and it makes me so very happy!

Anyth​ing you want to confe​ss?​​​
my nose piercing is infected and its really gross on the inside

Highl​ight of your day?
when the beautiful mysterious boy came into work finally! i didnt get all dressed up for nothing! and when micah told me about Jesus' excitability scale that goes from 1-cameron. hehe

Feel a sense​ of guilt​ latel​y?​​
not really...maybe for not working on my millions of homework and projects that are due at the end of the year. the end of november and first week in December are going to be rough unless i get it together! eek!

Want somet​hing badly​?​​​
community. and maybe a boyfriend or something of that multiple dates with a sweet guy would be ok with me too. im not obsessed or anything, but its hard not to think about it when ur 23, been single for far too long, and everyone else seems to be getting married or MIA because of significant others.

Is it cute when a boy/​​​girl calls​ you babe?​​​
im not sure ive ever had this happen. i think id be ok with it, but i can think of way sweeter and more enduring words he could use that would better describe me. babe seems kinda outdated anyway, this isnt 1985 no matter how hard you dress like it.

Who was the last perso​n of the same sex you share​d the same bed with?​​​
probably cassie in Europe. it was our favorite! i miss her a lot.

Which​ of your frien​ds do you argue​ with the most?​​
we dont really argue like for real...we have discussions were we disagree on things...but its not like an all out brawl where we cry and get mad or i dunno. actually, me and cassie went thru a phase in Europe where we "argued" a lot about random crap. dont worry tho, after like a week we went back to loving eachother like a sister so its ok:)

What is somet​hing you like to do when you'​​​re down?​​​
sleep, its my favorite and also my worst habit. i also like to eat cookies, also a bad habit. or have a drink, also a bad habit. over the last few years as ive realized this about myself, ive tried to quit doing those things and instead go play with friends and laugh or talk to my momma or play with my doggies or journal and draw: all those things always make me happy, i just forget sometimes.

Is it easie​r to forgi​ve or forge​t?​​​
both are so so hard. if u get to the point where u an forgive its amazing...but ur memory keeps on rearing its ugly head everytime ur feeling a little weak. life is rough people.

What is one thing​ you must have in a relat​ionsh​ip?​​
communication. it seriously makes the world go round.

Do you belie​ve in secon​d chanc​es?​​​
what is this referring too? my answer depends on that obviously. for the most part ill give someone a 2nd chance under specific guidelines and with a new protection over whatever got hurt in the first place.

If there​ was somet​hing you can do over,​​​ what would​ it be?
my first trip to India. i feel like i was so stressed out with life before going and vaunerable to the deep sadness that penetrated my heart upon seeing the ugliness there. it was so awful that i couldnt see any of the amzing beauty or make as much of an impact i feel like i could have made. i was just a lil 18 year old, so its ok.

Did the last perso​n you kiss deser​ve it?
nope. im hoping to have a much better "last kiss" asap

Do you think​ you can possi​bly be with the perso​n you love forev​er?​​
unfortunatly im not in love, but if i was then i would probably say yes...unless something was seriously wrong and i was in denial, which could potentially happen.

How do you feel about​ yours​elf as a perso​n?​​
i think im fat and over analytical. BUT i think otherwise im not to bad looking and i try and use my over analytical side to change the world instead of ruining my own.

What do you have plann​ed for your life?​​
ive only planned until ive gotten my degree and credential in spring 09. then ill either get a sweet job at a nice local public school or private school. or ill substitute teach and finish my art degree. or ill work at a museum working in the childrens program. or ill work in an after school art program in low economic areas...something like that:) then eventually ill get married and get my babies from India and LOVE my life!

Can you hones​tly say that looks​ don'​​​t matte​r?​​​
of course they matter! but in the end, if the person on the inside is ugly, it always comes out one way or another...and sooner then u think.

Would​ you rathe​r hear the painf​ul truth​ or a happy​ lie?​​​:​​​
depends on the situation again. usually, i do better with the truth, but i may need time away to deal with it...then we can be friends again;)

What reall​y irrit​ates you?
people who talk...A LOT. and never ask you about yourself, because they dont care, they just want to tell u all about the nothingness in their life. if u cared at all to begin with, you now want to kill them and then yourself. i also hate over achievers which is unfortunatly about half my teaching group at school. i also dont like politicians because they are liars and talk too much and do too little...and yet i cant stop watching the news. i also dont like people who try really hard to be cool or liked or whatever, just be who you are! i could go on...this is only the beginning.

Is there​ someo​ne you'​​​re attra​cted to?
ALWAYS. this is the life of an outgoing single 23 year old: you begin to have crushes on random people you see on a regular basis who smile at you. ie: the guy from the office, starbucks guy from school, the guy in the writing center (note ive never actually been in the writing center but the math lab is right next door so...), the cute indie guy who i walk by on my breaks at school, and a few "real" people from my former life who will always know me as a friend...the ol dawsons creek episode. haha.

that was definitly one of my better surveys.

my hero.

Sunday, October 12, 2008

so relaxing its almost boring?!

this weekend has been so so nice!
friday i spent the day organizing my music and putting CD covers on all my albums. it was out of hand and im such a freak about it being organized i dont know how it got so bad! well i do, I've changed computers and deleted and then reuploaded my music library many times. im going to back up my perfect iTunes so it will always be pretty now:) but my actual ipod is another story. more organizing to ensue! yay!

in the evening Annie came over and gave me my awesome birthday gift. a bunch of sweet office supplies from "The Office", love it! she helped me make dinner even though she was tanked and i picked up cammie from the train! we had a lovely dinner of pasta and salad (pretty much the only thing i can cook without fussing with a recipe book) and annie brought a cake and we had soy ice cream too! well, i had soy ice cream:) then we watched a favorite movie, The Life Aquatic with Stevesie Zissou. so funny!

yesterday me and cammie slept in reallll good and we went to the apple store to get something and i fell in love with an employee there that im sure ive met before but i cant remember when or where...hes my type. i love him. im trying to think of more reasons to go there and flirt with him. gosh, i have crushes on the best buy guy, the starbucks guy, and now the apple guy. i think im getting into that "crazy lady" realm and id better get out quick. anyway, then we got justin burritos and ate at the beach and went for a walk and sat in the lovely sunny sand. then we went to Envirogentle before cammie had to go home. then i took a nice.

today i slept in again reallll good. then i wrote a paper, studied for my mid term tomorrow, researched my summer adventure ideas for the summer, and now i think im going to make some pizza and watch my vampire show:)

such a nice weekend. i havent really been bored ive just been enjoying myself and being would have been too lonely without cammie and annie...but otherwise, its been nice to just read and nap and cook and relax.

PS im really upset because Degrassi is back for another season with all these young kids i dont know or care about and im upset because im too old for the show anymore and i miss my youth:( cassie is the only one who understands. i miss her.

summer adventure ideas so far: staff a DTS at YWAM Madison. staff the kids program at Hume Lake. watch what happens!

PS: i got a bunch of new music and its SO exciting! i have an ongoing list of music i want all the time...i add to it upon my research and readings...well i was able to cross a few off! new Cat Power, Dashboard Confessional, Interpol, Conor Oberst, MGMT, and i even broke down and got a few Duffy songs. i only bought 2 albums and 4 songs so it wasnt too crazy, the other two were for my birthday from brother. but ive been enjoying my new music SO SO much. ive earned it. love it.


Wednesday, October 08, 2008

my current observations:

im sitting outside the math lab on campus. i can be found here about once every 2 weeks because i suck at math, however lately ive been having issues with this place.

1) if this is a place to do homework and work on problems, why is it so dang LOUD?! the staff are literally shouting to each other across the room talking about their other math classes, social security numbers, meetings, tests, you know: really important things i need to hear about while im trying to do my work. sometimes when i ask for help, i cant even hear them explain to me the problems. i have to listen to my headphones the entire time im in there in order to actually get anything done. its so strange to me, why have a study place when no one can study cause your all gabbing away like old ladies about your stupid math classes?
PS i am currently sitting OUTSIDE the math lab and can still hear these loud mouths.

2) they always make me sign in and it takes me like 10 minutes to fish out my student ID out of my bag because i can never remember the number. why do u need me to sign in? my professor doesnt require me to sign in and show that i was there so why have me do it? im not 5 years old, and the door is always clogged with people also fishing out their IDs and trying to enter them onto the super slow log in computer. come on people, this is 2008.

3) there is a poor girl in there with SO much makeup on that i wanted to cry. it didnt even look good, in fact it looked pretty awful. im concerned for her. people: STOP PUTTING LIQUID EYE LINER ON YOUR LOWER LID it looks realllllly reallllllly awful and your really not supposed to use it like that.

4) there was this really cute guy leaving when i came in and he was joking with the ladies that he was wearing the same thing he wore to bed except his was really bad because it was a grey shirt and showed all the sweat and is gross...i didnt hear the beginning of the conversation but he was really funny and made me feel better about wearing the same thing again today. heres my reasoning on the matter though: i only wore it to small school and was in A/C all day so i didnt really sweat or anything. then i just sat in bed and worked on things. then i got a pedicure. then i changed. so really, i didnt do a lot in this outfit so who cares. i just think its funny. annnnd my rents are gone and im at normal school today so no one will ever know!

in other news:
i taught a really wonderful math lesson yesterday! yay! we did a big chart with bracelets with 4 charms on each bracelet and drew them all out until we got to 12. i was introducing their new number patterns chapter as it connects to multiplication. then they had to come up with their own item and make their own chart. it was so fun! and the kids were so creative and worked nicely with their partners and it was just so cute! some kids drew a head with 4 teeth in each funny. another group did pigs (4 legs on each of course:). a few groups did cookies, a variation of the bracelet charms questions, etc. i had a lot of fun doing it and i think it went well. we'll see what my evaluation says though!

another rant: i get really frustrated with people who try and talk about politics and why they are voting for the person they are voting for, but then when i ask them legit questions about specific issues and why they think the way they do they just spout some generality they heard from someone else (usually their parents or sometimes a friend whos kinda an extremist on either end). it happens on both the democratic and republican side and it just frustrates me. if your going to try and talk about something, at least be knowledgeable about it. otherwise you just sound like an idiot. THINK FOR YOURSELF.

crazy times!

Tuesday, October 07, 2008

something boring In honor of my birthday

well ive been reading over my old blog entires from last year and its been sooo interesting. i wish id kept this for longer...i havent changed a ton in a year, but in 2 years ive changed a lot. anyway. this is a survey from Nov. 9th last year so lets see how things have changed. im bolding my new answers. its not very exciting, but im bored so here you go...

1.The status of you and the last person you texted?
micah ficah! my dear long lost friend who i shall reunite with this weekend. Alyssa, my dear friend from school

2. What's bothering you right now?
im bored and i wish i had friends who werent busy and i went out. and i miss olivia. my parents are going out of town for a week and im going to be so lonely!

3. What's the closest green thing to you?
literally nothing in my room is green...weird. aha! a green coaster next to me!

4. What is in your wallet?
oh you know, an amazing amount of membership cards...some credit/bank cards...receipts...extra nose rings...little to no cash. exact same answer. but i do have a new disneyland pass (new as in i didnt have one last Nov.) and a NEW Cosco membership card which ive never had before! yay!

5. Wallpaper on your computer's desktop?
it changes every minute...currently its a cute picture of Rilo Kiley. still revolving, same sweet folder of pictures i love and have found online and just drag in the "desktop pictures" folder...currently its an Iron & Wine show poster

6. Background on your cell phone?
me and olivia from long long ago. My favorite painting, The Kiss by Klimt.

16. Listening to?
new episode of degrassi! new interpol i got for my birthday (finally!) yay!

17. Have you ever kissed anyone named Chase?
ive never even met anyone named chase actually. still no.

18. What do you smell like?
hemp. its my shampoo, teehee. my NEW Marc Jacobs purfume which i LOVE. birthdays are pretty much the best invention EVER. you get all the things you cant afford for yourself normally!

19. Eating?
wine. drinking water. no more wine!!! (for now;)

20. What's your favorite thing to have on your bed?
a bella and lola. oh little doggies, i love you but you smell. i prefer people now.

21. If you could change something in your life, what would it be?
oh be done with school and teaching art in a sweet private school in italy. i would be living with dear friends in downtown Carlsbad or Enc. and would be rich so i didnt have to worry about trying to pay rent and be in crazy school!

22. What do you wear to bed?
pants and old band shirts cause im cool like that. same!

23. Do you remember your dreams?
not usually...and whenever i do it freaks me out cause i get deja vu. same! every once in awhile i get a doozy though

24. Who will you sleep with tomorrow?
bella and lola. they have their own bed now which is sad but good for me, i get sleep! i sleep alone. like always.

25. Have you ever been gambling?
a little bit, but im not really into drunkinly throwing away money that could feed little children in india. i find gambling stupid for the exact same reasons.

26. What's something you wish you could understand better?
why college is so hard. new answer: what boys want (besides the obvious)

27. What did you do last night?
went to art class and then got updated on my shows. went out to dinner for my birthday with the whole family! so fun!

28. Who do you miss?
olivia cassie micah cammie. now just Olivia and Cassie. two down, two to go!

29. Who is the last person you hugged?
annie yesterday when she went home sick:( my doggies, they always want cuddles:) but a real person, i think uncle dan and Josi last night at birthday dinner!

30. Do you keep up with MLB standings?
i dont know what that is. ok ive figured it out, its major league baseball right? ok, but no.

31. Who was the last person you went somewhere with?
alyssa from school and i went chalk drawing in the night. momma just took me to get our toes done, yay!

33. Have you kissed anyone on your top friends?
why yes, yes i have. ok not really, not a realllll kiss.

36. What was the last thing you drank?
wine. water water water

37. Where were you at noon yesterday?
workin it up gettin paid doubleeeee. in math class re-learning things we did in like algebra I...yeah i dont know why either.

38. Who was the last person you visited in the hospital?
my great grandpa maybe. the Jacobs when Lukey was born almost a year ago! AMAZING night!

39. Do you like someone right now?
not sucks. i always like someone, i was probably lying last time

40. Are you bored?
YES. which is y ive instigated this here survey. not really, i have other things to do but im too tired to do them. besides, its almost bed time! yay!

41. What is the last movie you watched?
i tend to watch parts of movies. the last part of a movie i watched was That Thing You Do! SOOO GOOD!!! ooooo it was Zach Galifinakis live at the purple oinion, SO good! way better then my last answer! for sure!

42. Name three drinks you regularly drink.
diet coke, water, tea. water is about it now. diet coke it for weekends only. boundaries people, i need boundaries.

43. What are you excited about?
WINTER!!! school being over...working more and having money...NEW YORK!...not to mention christmasssss!!! the semester being over, winter weather, yeah thats all for now. i need to plan an adventure.

44. Do you want someone you can't have?
sometimes. he just needs to get it together. haha, same answer as last time but im pretty much over it now. i just get confused. i doooo have a crush on the starbucks guy at my school...i think he likes me though so its ok.

45. Who was last to slap your butt?
weird. ok thats it, i need a boyfriend.

46. Where was the last place you went?
to take a stupid 3 hour computer competency test at school. didnt you already ask this? me and mom went to get pedicures?

47. What's on your mind right now?
my super fun weekend. how i reallllly need to go to bed

48. Have you cried recently?
ive been really teary lately whenever i read this news...theirs just a lot of sad stuff always happening and i cant handle it sometimes. ive teared up about a few things lately but havent actually cried. a little when i was pondering about the upcoming election and the state of our country and world. a little at the show on Friday. when i miss cassie and olivia. when im lonely. but i recover quickly.

49. Do you want to be in a relationship right now?
yeah but i just wanna have fun. its getting out of hand actually.

50. And why?
cause i like boys and kissing and cuddling and dates and fun. because im awesome and someone is missing out on my awesomeness. pretty much the best possible answer anyone could ever give to that question...hahaha

Monday, October 06, 2008

happy birthday to me!

yayyyyy its my 23rd birthday!!!

i had such a lovely birthday weekend. Friday night me and the rents went to see my favorite musicians of all time play a show on the same bill! what are the odds?!

Iron & Wine


the Swell Season as featured in the movie ONCE (my fav movie of all time of course).

that was quite a night. for all of us music lovers out there, we know that feeling your body gets when your listening to some amazing music. its hard to describe. its like your heart is beating so fast and you start breathing really fast and you feel kinda tingly and so happy but also like to want to cry...and sometimes you do. you want to close your eyes and fall into the sound but also want to keep them open to see how they are making that beautiful noise. its got to be similar to how a drug makes people feel. thats the best i can describe it. if you've never experienced this either your listening to shitty music or you're never allowed to say "im really into music"...or both options of course.

anyway, then Saturday i slept in real good and played with kelsey and annie and jordan a little and then went down to Micah and Cammies for a joint birthday for me and Julia. Our birthdays are both today! yay! they had a black and white theme party and me and Julia got to wear a dash of color cause its our birthday:) it was SO fun! Tisha and CJ were there...and cammie and micah of course...and new church friends. so nice. except when i drank too much and wasnt a happy camper. hence, why i did NOTHING on Sunday because i was so so so sick. Champange can really do me in apparently. not fun. but im feeling fine today and just went to school. tonight me and the entire family are going out for a nice Italian dinner in Enc! yay! so fun!

heres some really cute pictures from Saturday night, i LOVE them!

Friday, October 03, 2008

something funny

in case you dont know, me and my friend annie both work as the receptionist at an executive suites in the area. actually, the correct term is "office manager" since we do more than just answer phones and mail stuff:) anyway, annie works M-TH and i work Fridays. me and annie write work notes to each other to keep up on things going on in the office. usually they are just normal office things, but sometimes its just really boring here and uneventful so i write funny notes or decorate them or leave her weird things on the computer, etc. this weeks note is just really funny and since she wont see this till at least Monday im posting some excerpts for your viewing pleasure.

"Brad Pitt" is the beautiful and mysterious boy who sometimes works in the studio. hes so mysterious we dont actually know his name. he only smiles...sometimes...

the final paragraph is clearly a reference to Twilight in case your an idiot and havent read it (seriously, go read it now)


Hey Annie!
Special Events as of today. PS I like how in the rent folder it says “bills that have special needs” I think it’s funny. Its like one bill is in a wheelchair, another is blind, maybe one has one leg, etc…I laughed out loud thinking you were trying to be funny but then realized maybe you didn’t even realize your genius…although then again, maybe you did and chuckle every time you open the folder…in fact maybe you wrote it on purpose so every time you opened the folder you would laugh instead of hate your job or something. I just don’t know anymore.

I think the office is going to keep being crazy with everything going on with the financial industry and all the offices booked and the studio stuff and the magazine being all crazy too. It’s just a crazy time I think! If it doesn’t slow down again eventually, I’m asking for a raise! Hehe just kidding (or am I?)

I just talked to Brad Pitt. I asked him what he got for lunch when he got back and he said

“just on a roll”

…he said 4 words to me…sigh…

(does “a” count as a word? It does now)

I just wish he wore tighter pants.

I had a delicious veggie burrito from Primos today and a GIANT diet coke. When I asked them for the biggest cup they ever had he jokingly started to walk to the back and said “hold on, lemme just go get a bucket”. I laughed a lot, it was just so clever of him! Little does he know I could clearly down an entire bucket of diet coke and this is no laughing matter.

I keep forgetting to tell you that the exact other side of my neck has exact replicas of my other vampire bite. It’s weird. I think someone beautiful sneaks through my window at night and love bites me and holds me in his freezing stone cold arms. Swoon…

me and annie at the office last winter. clearly Big Gulps of Diet Coke (or Coke for the Ginger) are preferable over coffee ANY day! (its ok to be thinking- "big gulps huh...welp, see ya later!" we said that pretty much every time we had them too...which was pretty much everyday)