Friday, September 30, 2011


Some snippets of my life from these last two weeks...

Red, pink, and white heart shaped balloons being let out over the river randomly last Saturday while on my date with birthday boy. Imagine snuggling with a boy you like, sitting at a cafe along the river in perfect weather, drinking gin and tonic, and this this happens! Magic.

And then he orders you this to share! OMG I CANT DESCRIBE THE GOODNESS.

Fall informed us she was coming by sending a crazy rain storm for a few days. My new vintage trench and rain hat were happy to assist. Although we are still in denial winter is coming and whine whenever we pass the stores with winter clothes out. I really wish I knew how to edit that horrible white box out of the photo...

Tomorrow is my big birthday gala! Yippie! 



Thursday, September 29, 2011

Let's Remember...

So I've been reflecting...

At how this time last year I was crying my eyes out.

Literally could not breathe or function.

Because that dick Number 2 stopped calling me forever. A few days before my birthday, we had plans for sushi for my birthday. We were seriously talking about going to Mexico after his grad apps were finished. I was breaking up with SS because I thought Number 2 was finally ready to get serious. We'd been together and "in love" for a year. I was coming off of the worst year of my life with mom being sick...3 family members dying...swine flu...and student teaching/death...

Then I spent my Alice in Wonderland birthday party without a call back from either of them and swore off men for the rest of the year.

3 months later I moved to Europe and ride to work looking fabulous on the public transit I know by heart everyday thinking, "Man, I love my life!!!!". Then I spend my weekends dancing on tables, sitting in little coffee shops reading and drinking tea, baking in my own flat, or even sometimes having slumber parties with various gentleman callers.

I must say, this has been QUITE the year.

And twenty-six is bound to be 10x better then twenty-five...when I cried on my way to my own birthday party.

THIS YEAR I am having, perhaps the birthday party I was always meant to.

We're booked at the nicest bar in town that overlooks the entire city, took us a week to get the reservation, and I get to make everyone get as dressed up as I always am when we go out. I got us 2 bottles of champagne for the 15+ people coming and am making funfetti cake with the mix I brought back with me from the states. Then we have a table booked at the nicest club in the city for afterwards! I have the beautiful and sweet male suitor whose been courting me who will be by my side all evening (and made the club reservations for me:) And all of my dearest friends from Bratislava will be there! The plan is to drink more gin and tonic and champagne then should be allowed, dance on a table, have my face hurt from smiling, embarrass myself somehow publicly, and have some birthday sex. I feel like all of this is doable.

I am trying to not be so depressed about turning OLD and just now decided to call it
"Twenty Six- The Year of Wonder" 

I think it has a nice ring to it...

Let the shit show begin!



Wednesday, September 28, 2011

Happy Birthday To ME.

Oh friends! Guess who reappeared?

No, not music man. I wish. He's still in the douche category.

I'll give you a hint, he left my flat after failing to um...properly finish the session...almost threw up on me, then left with barf in a bag in one hand, and the knickers he accidentally dropped in the other, head hung. Hating life. Thats right, birthday boy is back!

I didn't forget about him, because we definitely had a connection, but I knew he was leaving mid October and that nothing was going to happen really anyway. Then randomly he texted me about wanting to hang out, and while it may have been interpreted as a booty call (before I left we did both agree we needed a redo anyway), we had a date all afternoon and evening on Saturday and it was perfect. Although we were a little affectionate, it clearly wasn't a booty call...and actually he surprised me as being a very sweet, clever, funny, and all around awesome person.

After apologizing and then laughing excessively about the tragic evening we shared a few months ago, (sorry I didn't call's taken me this long to get my pride back...) he made the day all about me (I know right) so we sat at my favorite spot and drank gin n tonic by the river all afternoon, the weather was PERFECT, and everyone was out. Then we got a big beautiful ice cream (his idea) and while eating it together everyone let these pink, white, and red heart shaped balloons go up over the river. Hundreds of balloons floating up all was so romantic we kind of laughed about it. Then we walked to a Czech/American restaurant and ate dinner/ drank more. I can't remember the last time I laughed so much in one day and was so happy.

And to be honost, it was nice to not have ANY pressure. We'd already had sex (kind of...), know he's leaving, and just get to have fun with the beginning part of something.

I think we both want to build up a little more before we hook up again...for real this time. So we didn't hook up Saturday, and tonight we're just meeting for dinner before he has to work the midnight shift.

But I love how he pursues me. I'm getting the ol texting, "you're beautiful", I want to spend time with you, whatever you'd like to do, insisting on paying for everything: treatment and I have to say- it's rather nice.

Next Thursday is MY 26TH BIRTHDAY. Fuck, I'm old.

I find it ironic I am rekindling with Birthday Boy on my birthday.

Thursday, September 22, 2011

Favorite Things.

Some things I liked this week...

Oh Good.

Roomie texted Music Man the other day because she was mad (and does this behind my back because she gets so annoyed, haha), something to the tune of- "Hey, heard you are MIA, hope you're ok, what happened?"- that was the jist.

After IIIIIII haven't heard from him in 2 weeks, he texts HER back.

Something about being busy and playing baseball over the weekend and not seeing her or some bullshit like they're old friends or something.

I immediately read it as- he has a thing for her- and am now kind of sulking and am hurt.

I'm not angry with her or anything.

Just hurt that this guy who kept presenting himself as "a good guy" who liked me, is just a douche like the rest of them.

Where do I FIND these guys?!

As of right now, I'm just reallllly looking forward to the next work function so I can look hot and ignore him all night. But then roomie pointed out, I would never actually be mean or ignore a guy even though he was a douche to me, because I'm too nice. And since they know that, they do this shit to me.

That's it, I need to start breaking windows.



Monday, September 19, 2011

Another Moment.

Another "I LOVE MY LIFE!" moment as it is storming outside...I am at the packed and adorable cafe downstairs drinking amazing tea and working more (I know, workaholic) while my cleaner/cook is upstairs making the house beautiful and making us dinner.

I mean, seriously, how am I EVER supposed to come back to America after this?!

Oh. And after Friday was semi shitty and I was an emotional mess all week, the rest of the weekend was AMAZING as we went to the special Slovak wine festival all afternoon and evening on Saturday and then roomie and I had a date all Sunday shopping and loving life like old times! I got so many things I've been needing (pictures to come) on sale and in my size and stuck to the list and budget, it was a fantastic day!

Wine Festival:

Sorry if you also read my travel blog and saw these added to my personal FB, but I want to give a well rounded perspective on the AWESOMENESS that IS the burčak wine festival. Slovakia in September is the ONLY place you can get this special "young wine" that isn't completely fermented yet, so it tastes like juice! Still gets you wasted though effectively enough...

We took the train along with the rest of Bratislava to the next village called "Pezinok" and this was the church in the main square where the festival was...

Me and my co-teachers / old roomies

All of us with our first bottle!

 The little festival filled with the Slovak version of fair food...

The old O2 phone company duck that looks like he pulled the costume out of a dump was there scaring children and hitting me with his tail...

 so fun! Those are most of the teachers I work with, besides roomie and her bf on the right of course. 

mmmmm young wine...

After we got seats we didn't move the entire evening except to take turns buying another 4 euro bottle of wine...

The right one is the normal yummy Slovak red wine, and the left one is the special September Slovak young wine. Juiceeeee

Perhaps the best highlight was taking the last train back to Bratislava along with the rest of the drunk cities young people...

Standing room in between cars only! We couldn't move and I may have almost had an anxiety attack...

Walked from the train station home...or rather skipped and sang home...

I wanted to capture how lovely I felt...



Saturday, September 17, 2011


Remember when my Friday nights ended at 5a dancing on tables and refusing (or sometimes accepting...) male invitations to go home with me? And that 4 nights out of 7 I wasn't home until 12:30 either?

Since I've been home my bestie/partner in crime roomie is all wrapped up with her bf and work, plus all of my friends here have been so MIA or are out of town- so my last 2 Friday nights I was lucky to go out with music man until the wee hours of the morning. Then last night roomie had only worked a half day and we didn't have plans Saturday until the afternoon so I thought for SURE we'd go and do something like we always used to. AND I was upset that music man has disappeared so I really needed to socialize.

au contrar.

"bf is coming over and we're just going to watch a movie. He's really tired." HE'S ALWAYS REALLY TIRED!!! So I went alone to meet up with some friends from work hoping the drink at the pub would turn into a longer evening...but by 9:30 they were all yawning and asking for the bill. I got all dressed up to go to the half empty pub for an hour, sit quietly while my friend talked the ENTIRE time, only to walk back home by myself. Where upon my roomie and bf greeted me all over each other on the couch giggling and doing that annoying "we're in love and in our own little world...lalala" thing. So I just went to my room and watched True Blood and went to sleep.

Not the worst evening ever of course, at least I got to get out a bit and getting dressed up was fun (even if no one cared). But if something doesn't change soon I might have to rethink staying here longer. I love teaching but its not like my school is that amazing. They have so many problems and the lack of resources and support is exhausting. Plus, I am so social, and if my social life is going down the toilet and all I am going to do is work...well its no wonder I am feeling icky as of late. Let's just say I am starting to be really open to the idea of moving to another country to teach...

Good News Though! Today we're going to a wine festival! In the month of September in Slovakia, every weekend another district holds a festival for their "young wines" which is apparently what they're famous for. This weekend is supposed to be a really good one with music and fireworks. Plus, according to the weather it appears this weekend to be the last warm days before the temperatures start slowly dropping. I had to kind of beg roomie to get her ass together and come and some other people from work are going too. It'll be nice to actually DO something. I've been feeling so sad and claustrophobic...maybe this will help snap me out of it.

Once again, I would apologize for my whining about my life, but it is MY blog so...

Thursday, September 15, 2011

Pretty...In A Creepy Way

Christopher Payne and I share the same intrigue with old asylums. 
Beautiful in such a creepy and morbid kind of way...

The High Life.


Factors of Today:

"I'm sorry, I want to talk more but I have to go. Our new cook is coming over and then i have a waxing appt so im trying to get out the door. hahaha my life in that last sentence is amazing."


"We were frightened of being left alone for the rest of our lives. Only people of a certain disposition are frightened of being alone for the rest of their lives at the age of 26, and we were of that disposition."- High Fidelity 

Today I woke up to a message from my family saying my mum had to go to the emergency room because she was having sharp pains and shortness of breath. She was now staying a minimum of 24 hours there because her lung collapsed (due to another painful procedure done the day before). Mixed feelings overcame me. Such as...ok, she's going to be ok, thank God it wasn't a heart attack. And then...guilt for not being home. And such a drained feeling...I really don't have the energy or heart for this hospital stuff anymore, and I know she doesn't. And just a sad scared feeling for my momma in general. Roomie gave me a hug and reminded me it's going to be ok before she went to work. But I'm still feeling shitty about not hearing from that boy anymore too. 

Talked to myself/God for a good hour last night in my room. It helped I guess.


Then good things happened...

One of the LOVES of my life, Cammie, is coming to visit me in October for like 2 weeks! We were waiting and waiting for him to get the time off approved and I didn't want to get my hopes up unless he had a ticket. But today he got approved AND the ticket so he's coming for my October break! Hence when:  "I'm sorry, I want to talk more but I have to go. Our new cook is coming over and then i have a waxing appt so im trying to get out the door. hahaha my life in that last sentence is amazing." occurred. We were discussing our wardrobe plans, the cities we want to go to, etc. So that significantly affected my mood in a positive way. Especially since my few friends here will be working the entire time and I couldn't afford to do a huge trip AND try and afford to go home for Christmas. 


After I showed our new cleaner/cook around and got my hooha all waxed and squeaky clean, I took my work stuff with me and walked through my little old city to the French cafe I've been meaning to try. I started feeling sorry for myself as I skyped with my mum while she lays in the hospital, my phone still isn't ringing from the boy, and this stupid little black cloud won't lift...but then I looked at my reflection in the computer...and suddenly noticed how all the tourists and men are looking at me as they walk by. And realized: I'm sitting here on my pretty laptop, with my pretty phone, pretty French manicure and dress, listening to my favorite Iron & Wine songs, drinking tea and planning an epic October holiday with one of my most fabulous friends surrounded by my BEAUTIFUL little city with perfect weather. YES my mum is in the hospital, but she's going to be fine, and YES that boy is being kind of stupid and bringing up the "you're going to die alone" feelings again, and YES I need to make more friends here...but really...In this moment. How could I not be so happy?

So I'm going to order another tea...and some of the amazing looking chocolate cake from the treat window. Then go home and enjoy the soup our new cook is making us for dinner. 
And try and sit in being happy and content for awhile. 

Wednesday, September 14, 2011

Feeling Blue

During work I am happy and love my life, but lately as soon as work ends I am feeling blue again. It might be that grey cloud I get sometimes that just follows me around that I refuse to medicate (although I am getting in touch with an English speaking therapist here, yay me). But it might also be my mum going through health things and I'm not there, money problems that may mean I don't get to go home for Christmas, roomie/bestie being all wrapped up in work and her bf, all my other "friends" here being completely MIA since I've been back, and this stupid boy appears he may be over me already or maybe just wants to move it into the friend zone. Although we spoke Sunday about work stuff, I haven't heard from him since and have no plans for the weekend with him either. I know he's working a lot, but I am really trying to stay on my new band wagon of "no one is too busy for you"...even to send a text, right?  But then every time someone asks me about it and I say "I dont know, I haven't heard from him since Sunday...and that time I contacted him..." they nod like thats normal. So maybe I am one would be surprised here. This tends to happen when I actually like them. Crazy lady surfaces. 

Also...I think I was really excited about being close with him even just for companionship. Since roomie and other friends are so absent right now, I don't really have anyone to talk to. And he told me his entire crazy life story the second night we hung out, I didn't get a chance to share at the I wasn't ready, but I was so hoping to find someone else here to be close with. Lately I haven't even been missing sex or all the fun girly things about being in a relationship- I think I just want the genuine friendship and closeness. Of someone caring about you SO much for no reason other then you just being you. 

And any level of rejection, especially when I start to let myself like the guy, bring everything from the past up. Every boy who stopped calling me and all the reasons I wonder why roll around again. I just keep blaming myself "What is WRONG with me that men don't want me?". And logically I know the old saying- it's them and not me- but if it keeps happening over and over again don't you have to start looking at yourself too? Isn't that basic psychology? 

I don't know. But tomorrow is a holiday (random Thursday in Slovakia off? Yeah, standard) so I get to sleep at a cafe...and get my hooha waxed. PLUS our new cleaner/cook starts tomorrow and I am SO FREAKING EXCITED! She's going to come Monday and Thursday and clean, laundry and cook a meal for us, do some of our shopping'll probably take her a few hours each day. And we are paying her 7 euro an hour!!!! I love it here! She only wanted 5/hour, but we felt too guilty so we upped it a bit. But the minimum wage is seriously like 3 euro/hour so she's SO EXCITED. We've been working such long hours lately (and its pretty normal) that we just don't have time to cook or energy to go we're doing the American thing and hiring out, hehe. YAY. 



Tuesday, September 13, 2011


Such a LONG WEEK OF DEATH. First day of school was pretty good, I say pretty good because I love my class and everything within my room is pretty much fantastic, but otherwise (as always) the organization and drama with the management at the school is ridiculous so I had to pick up even more extra classes at the last minute and was working until 5:30p at school every night last week and then coming home to work MORE. So, it was a long week. And more drama over the weekend with our head of A-levels taking off and them hiring a new director without telling anyone today (I found out on accident). But again, my class is AMAZING and I am finishing everything except our stupid school staff busy work by 4:00 now this week...and coming home to work more, but at least its in front of the TV and on my couch.

Music Man called last Sunday night but I missed his call. Otherwise we just texted twice during last week and I was kind of bummed. Then Friday night roomie convinced me to just invite him to the pub a bunch of staff were going to, and sure enough he texted me back and showed up and we hung out most of the rest of the night. By 11 we found ourselves alone (roomie had to take the drunk bf home- another night, another scene from those two) and went to get a snack and chat. However, I now find myself slightly confused. I feel like I am getting mixed signals which could either be him being a good guy and trying to take it slow, or like he's just not into me.

We should discuss something more serious now actually. I think the foundation of my insecurity in this is in how I feel about myself. This guy...thus so good, so amazing, that everything about him I decided a long time ago either didn't exist, were already taken, or certainly wouldn't be into me. Mostly the latter. I keep waiting for him to want to just be friends because I'm too ___________ <----insert here anything I've ever told myself. Mostly Fat. Silly. Stupid. Young. etc. I seriously can't believe someone like my old thrown away list exists, and that they could potentially value ME. And that's not to say I don't have confidence in myself, because Lord knows we've come a long way in this department this year. It would just appear that there are still some secret "you're not good enough" compartments tucked away in there that I haven't quite reached.

Therefore, I am totally in the "when is he going to call and make plans with me?!?!?!" mode- not obsessing yet- but time still seems to move so slowly. I find myself getting annoyed "UGH, why haven't I heard from him, he doesn't like me, this sucks" only to realize its TUESDAY and we just spoke on SUNDAY. Calm down crazy, you've been out a few times and work is B-A-N-A-N-A-S for everyone right now so lets take it down a notch, k?

In other news I am finding myself more and more annoyed with roomie having her bf over all the fucking time. EVERY DAMN NIGHT he's here. He'll either come over right after work with her and then sleep over, or come after dinner at home and then sleep over. We have to now buy groceries and plan dinners for THREE, one of them being a very hungry boy, and I am irate. His home life kind of sucks, so thats why he's around a bit more then normal boyfriends- but also because neither of them get sick of each other and appear to not have any other significant friends or family. I mean, it's a small place...and I didn't sign up to live with a fucking couple. Plus I may be bitter that I lost my one and only bestie here now that bf is in the picture. Roomie and I used to do EVERYTHING together, weeknights we went out for drinks or dinner and weekends we ran errands and went shopping. Now she just wants to stay home with the bf and watch movies during the weeknights and on the weekends THEY go run errands. So I find myself alone all the time again and am starting to get sad and more frustrated with my lack of relationships here. This might also magnify why I want things to work out with Music Man so badly, besides how awesome he and we together are, I want new friends and a boyfriend would also just be really nice.

Ok, back to working from home alone...just like every night.


Sunday, September 04, 2011

Favorite Things: Lana Del Rey

Discovered this little gem on pitchfork, and totally fell in love with her voice, lyrics, and entire aesthetic. Her video for "Video Games" is beyond creative and cool, and she's pretty on top of it? Thats it, lets kill her.

OMG Love her. Repeat.

Exhibit A

Evidence of my singleness / awesomeness.

Goodbye Africa.

Well I finally officially ended things with Africa...AGAIN. Even the last few times we've hung out I just don't feel things for him anymore. I'm not attracted to him, I don't have sexual chemistry anymore, I was annoyed talking to him or trying to watch movies with his limited English (while before I didn't mind), and sometimes I didn't even want him to touch me. Plus, I've been pursuing other people and forgetting he even existed. All signs you aren't fulfilled or happy with your man and its time to end it...again. It was hard because he's so sweet. Always wanting to give me massages and cook for me, take care of me when I was sick. I mean, he's a really good guy. But the IT just wasn't there anymore. And no ones surprised considering the of and on again manner we've had the last few months and that I spent time with PAG and now music man over the summer...I mean, things are just different now.

But literally he texted and called me last night to see if he could come make me dinner. I mean, so sweet. I ignored him because I was sleeping (trying to sleep off my epic evening with another man, wow I am awesome/kind of a floozy) and then he texted me again today to see if I was ok. I responded with, "sorry I was sleeping...but can we not see each other anymore? I have a lot going on and I think I would rather be alone if thats ok. Im sorry, don't be sad!". It sucked and I feel bad about it, but we weren't too serious so hopefully he won't be too upset, and at least I didn't just stop answering his calls or texts like SOME people have done to me. 

So I am finally officially a free agent again. 

But am anxiously awaiting hearing from music man- which SUCKS- because I hate when I actually like them and get all cra cra. 

And it's Sunday and I'll be working all day, thanks.



Saturday, September 03, 2011



All I can say is, what a week. I haven't updated because I've barely had time to sleep and breathe. Tuesday and Wednesday we had back to school orientation for the teachers which was RIDICULOUS. So much drama, extra work and courses sprung up on me, teachers leaving suddenly, just unorganized craziness and stress.

Then Wednesday night we went out for drinks with sweet D whose leaving for a few weeks...Thursday was a Slovak holiday so EVERYONE was out on the town since they didn't have to work the next day. Including people from school...including the super cute new music man from work I'd been flirting with at orientation. I thought he was into the 4th grade teacher from the new campus because he was always talking to her and was somewhat flirty, but then I found out she's married and going through a hard time and he is just her assistant. So of course, I made my move at the Irish pub.

I feel like I should be sponsored in flirting. I mean seriously. I spotted him at the orientation on Tuesday, flirted both days, and had him getting my number and kissing me by Wednesday night. Friday roomie saw him at work and he was asking all about me so he called me right then but I didn't hear it and texted him later that night when roomie said "GIRL, CHECK YOUR PHONE!"

Flash forward to music man wanting to hang out. Picking me up from my flat and taking me to hang out with all his friends at a lounge/bar/music place down the street. Um. May have been one of the BEST evenings of my life. I realized even in the amount of men I've dated that I've NEVER met a guys friends or had a boy be all into me all night in front of his friends. As soon as music man saw me he wanted to kiss me again...and would have his hand on my back or around me majority of the evening...would sneak little kisses when his friends weren't directly talking to us...talking in my ear..I mean DAMN, we were that couple. And the best part was, his friends were really really lovely. They reminded me of all my friends back home- they were all musicians but grown up ones who are also married and have successful day jobs doing random things. Plus, their English was really really good and I think they liked me because I spent half the evening talking to them while music man talked to others separately. I was trying to make sure and prove I can chill on my own and that he doesn't have to babysit me...mission accomplished! The best part was when the evening was winding down and we were all sitting and man starts talking in my ear telling me sweet things and trying to convince me to let him come home with me when his friends say something in Slovak to us and they all laugh. Translation? "They said they are jealous, because they can tell we like each other and they have to go home alone" This was from the 2 not married ones. So cute.

He kept telling me he wanted to be with me all night, and after trying to avoid answering the question awhile, I told him he couldn't come home with me for two reasons.
1. I'm a lady (seriously, I actually like this one)
2.  Lady things are happening and it's not a good night. (periods ruin everything)
Secretly ALSO because I'm kind of a skank and had Africa over the last two nights because he didn't have anywhere to stay (seriously) and even though I'm not into him anymore, why pass up good sex? So my sheets were dirty. Yep, I'm that girl. But hey, doesn't it make you feel good to know I felt remorseful and knew I couldn't bring a new boy home yet? We're growing up.

Turns man is kind of...maybe...amazing. He wanted to come home and just be with me all night anyway, even if physical stuff wasn't part of the deal. Then he tells me, he's been celibate by choice for the last 4 years (omg can you imagine) because he wasn't a good guy before and now wants to wait until he's serious with a girl. I didn't totally believe him...until we got into bed and he didn't try and make a move. Don't worry, I pulled the "my room is a mess, give me ten minutes" routine and changed the sheets. Again, WHY am I not sponsored in this? (later roomie said, you should have just texted me "emergency! change my sheets please!"-this is why she's the best). We didn't get home until 3 and just slept and cuddled until noon today...then I made him a delicious breakfast of eggs and toast and we had a long long chat for a few hours.

The Details:
Get ready friends, this one is a serious the point that I'm super nervous around him, forget how to talk, and am having to try and stay calm.

1. We're referring to him as the music man because, he plays like every instrument there is. Toured with Jason Mraz. Is kind of famous in Bratislava because of how much music he's done here. Leads worship at a church here once a month...

2. After years of "being a bad guy" he got involved in church again and helps lead things at a church here...but he's not super conservative and weird...he drinks, smokes, goes out, swears. Apparently he has a masters of theology too...I know, this guy.

3. He's half Slovak and half canadian, but is living here for at least a year. He's lived all over the world.

4. He's looking for something serious. He's 32 and I think one of his only friends not married. But I dont think that means he wants to settle here in BA. He has the heart of a traveller, so I think he's up for adventures.

5. When I say he's "attractive" and "my type"...I can't even explain this enough. He's the type I gave up on being interested in me because they were so pretty, fashionable, outgoing, and musical so they could get any girl and pretty much ignored me. The fact that this guy is paying me so much attention and kissing me at the bar and then saying, "wow, this is going so well!" and then having his friends high five him because they know he never brings any girls around...I mean damn.

I'm hesitant to let myself feel anything because he's too perfect. And he's Christian enough to be one of those guys whose super picky and will find reasons he won't work with anyone. Plus, he's very outgoing and friendly so I don't know if it's anything special to be treating me this way.

I've been thinking about him since he left this afternoon...I definitely have a crush...and just FB stalked him just to seal in the 15 year old inside of me. I am so glad we had such a great night though. I mean, if anything I had one amazing night being treated like a proper girlfriend and got to end it cuddling with a great guy. And if dating doesn't work, we have a lot in common and I think would be really good friends.

So we'll see what happens.

But if I had my dream job teaching, get to live in my little European city, AND had a serious boy as amazing and this one seems...I just might die of happiness.

It's All Happening!