Tuesday, January 30, 2007

rainy tuesday!

i love tuesdays (dont know why tho) and i love the rain! so u would think itd be a great day, right?

but let me tell u a little story of my life.
pretty much everyday i leave the house wearing clothes that arent appropriate for the weather. today would be an example. this morning i left the house and it was so early i couldnt see it was cloudy and rainy looking. i was wearing my typical school outfit-kinda pajamas, kinda not- (thin cotton capri thingys and a tshirt...luckily i had a little hoodie too)
and then it stormed the entire day. imagine me trudging around campus soaking wet and slipping with my crap shoes i cant part with. this is my life.

i just dont like to be uncomfortable, which rules out most clothes.

i miss my friends. the ones who are far away.
ficah. olivia.tisha kitty.cammie.joejoe.annemarie.matty.pretty much all of the ol VPDQ.
sad times.
life is just like that ya know. people always going in and out of ur life. its hard to be alive.

im glad i have Jesus. He promised He wouldnt peace out on me, so ive got that going for me.

me and annie are almost all done with season1 of LOST. we were refreshing before season 3 starts again next wednesday. i think we only have 2 episodes left. sooo good. i wish i had 2nd season, i need to get that. i still love charlie. except in season3 he goes a little crazy...but then again, they all do.

im going to visit olivia during my spring break. im excited! when i get paid friday i think im going to buy my ticket. its f-ing expensive just for a dink 3 hr flight. but i miss her, and cant wait to go. also will be nice to get out of socal for awhile. haha, i dont leave until march 31st and im already excited. my parents will be in europe for 3 weeks right around then. annie shall be my room mate for awhile, yay! we're fun.

well thats all for now.

uninteresting because i cant write about anyone i know for fear they may read it. but still, this is my life all the same.

be well.


currently listening: Damien Rice "9"

Monday, January 29, 2007


sick sick sick.
im taking airborne and advil cold and halls lemon and honey cough drops and multivitamins and going to bed on time and using antibacterial lotion.

still have a cough
still a sore throat
still feel tired
still feel achey

still have to go to school.
still have to work.

pobre cita.


Saturday, January 27, 2007


so this blo0g idea blows. i cant write anything legit cause the people will read it. IE: they people i want to wrie about im friend with on myspace and they will read it...so im not sure what to do.

so i drank an engtire bottle of wine. chardonnay!!! so good! yeah...i just spelled a lot of stuff wrong and im ok with ut. it was a long week and i was with beloved friends so it was ok. i know Jesus still loved me and thsats all that matters...He's th best...e loves me even when i suck, which is often.

so daydreams...i have them all the time..and i learned at DTS how destructive they csn be when ur focusing on them and they arnet even real! so i tired to tell my friends that and it came off as just me being prideful and i was bummed...i really just wanted to help them and love them thru my bad experiences with day dreams...i feel bad, but also annoyed cause i was trying so hard to not be prideful and it still sucked. i just suck at life. Lord why am i here? all i do is stupid school (which i suck at) and work too much doing lame work with money. all everyone cares about in this worl is money...well PS: i dont care about money and it can kiss my ass. i care about Jesus and everyone needs to kno how awesome He is and how u dont neeede money to be happy.

i love my friends. but i need new ones...how do people make new friends? they all live to far...

isnt it weird how when uve drunk, u want to call people ur secretly in love with...im not telling.

tomorrow im going to the art store (yay!) for my class with annie too! and to dinner with cass and thne to chuirch and im so excited! i got to play with cass tonight and i love it...i missd er, but not i feel like shes not so MIA...perhaps my blog has reached her. haha, yeah right.

so miday atalantic (the band) im friends with rachel and its funny that we'[re all friends on myspace when i havent actually met u in person. weird huh. i have secret "crushes" on u cause ur pretty.

ok, time for bed...tomorrow im super duper busy...my life is ridiculous.

PS: i apologize for the ridiculousness of this blog in adcvsance...once again, it was a lon week, and Jesus still lvoes me. thates why we're friends. im sleepy. i wanna be an art teacher and adopt kids from all over the world, thats my drema life and i day dream abiout it all the time...but hold on while i give u a lecture about daydreaming, whenreally im jus trying to help with ur life but i suck at it...arrrrg...

this id a picture oif elephants, my fav animal.

Friday, January 26, 2007


BIG NEWS! Nicodemus, my 'brother' whos a 'Lost Boy' from Sudan, his beautiful face is on the cover of the San Diego Reader!!! and theirs a huge story about him and the other boys he lives with. his story will change ur life...everyone should meet them, they're the best.

this is from a few weeks ago.

yeah i dont look so hot in this pic, but i wanted u to see him. hes right in the middle. he brought his precious family with him! that baby was sooo cute...

this week has been ridiculous. i forgot how working 30 hours and school with 15 credits is...ridiculous.

the good news is that i think im going to like my classes...i was so annoyed in every class cause i didnt want to be in school and just kept thinking "um yeah...i dont care...", but then i decided i just need to change my attitude and buckle down and get into it and ill be fine. my classes arent that bad and my professors seem nice, and none of them are very hard which i looove.
so besides school.

i have this apple socal campus rep meeting to go to tomorrow. im currently waiting to get picked up by the other girls im going with cause we're staying (for free of course!) at the hotel tonight for the conference tomorrow. i was really cranky about going and sooo tired...but i took a rest/nap after work today (the other job) and gave myself the same pep talk i gave to myself about school, and im hoping that'll do the trick. im looking forward to it a little more i guess...but its going to be sooo long and boring, and im kinda over the job so thats never good.

in other news: im getting sick i think. my parents have been sick for like a week, and a bunch of people in my classes were all sick too, so its no suprise. but ive been taking airborne and cough drops and tea and vitamin C...so far my scratchy throat is still scratchy...and i think its getting worse. so that should be fun.

i reallly want to buy my ticket to go visit Olivia for my spring break in oregon (ok from SD to portland, its like 400$!!!) but im having to wait until i get paid...arrrrg i wish i was done with school and had my job already! i just want to teach art to kids! is that so wrong?! i hate working so hard but still having issues with money...im sure issues with money always exists tho.

today at my receptionist job i did so good! i did alllll this bill paying and quickbooks and stuff ive never done before and i did a good job! its a good feeling cause i suck at that stuff, but not anymore!

i brushed bella and shes all fluffy mcflufferson. its AMAZING. she feels and looks like a cloud. i love her.

i want to make new friends. im just so picky and where do people make new friends? is their like a club where people go to make new friends? ive made a few friends at school, but we dont hang out outside of school...o i remember why i dont have that many friends, its cause they all moved away and cause everyone is soooo busy all the time...haha, how could i forget...

i wanna move. to Florence Italy. im thinking after i get my BA and credential, ill get my masters in education through an online program and live in Florence. then when im done with that ill have enough italian under my belt to go to art school there for my master of fine arts...i wish i knew italian and could just go work there...ooooo maybe while im getting my masters i could teach english there! hey! and ill come home with a hot italian man and all my dreams will come true...teehee

well i suppose the girls will be here soon, its about time to leave...woo for work! woo!

paige and andrew are playing at church on sunday night and im soooo excited.

thats all.


(no ones leaving me comments so im assuming no ones reading this? do u have to have a blogger account to leave comments? no entiendo)

Tuesday, January 23, 2007

bleh school bleh

well ive had my first day of school in all my classes except child psycology which i only have on thursdays.

elementary school math:
i have an eastern european professor (i think russian) who totally talks like Borat. i hate math, but we're doing geomotry and graph and need all these tools and stuff, so i think i might like it more then my other math classes. as long as i get a C im happy.

i can tell already that the kids in the class are rather arrogant just from how they talked and presented what they wrote...but im trying to be nice and exert happy non-judgemental energy...we'll see. i think i could really like it, but i just hate people telling me how im supposed to interpret something...it gets on my nerves. and professors are always trying to expose their students to things...im tired of being exposed to things from their viewpoint. they're always really liberal and it gets on my nerves. i dont care what u think, k.

design and color:
i think it will be good. i thought i might make friends in the class, but no one seemed to look like someone i would be friends with (i have a good eye for that), in fact the girls sitting next to me i wanted to beat cause they were so obnoxious. i really like ink drawing and collages, and thats mostly what we will be doing! so i will finally learn some actual techniques, besides what ive taught myself. annnd we will paint...i love painting (from what ive done) but i never get to do it cause i dont kno how and its so expensive to get all the materials. so hopefully this will be a good class too.

i also have science online, which i havent even touched...so we'll see how things go with that too.

thats about it. im working too much and im already exhausted and its only tuesday. arrrg

be well.


Monday, January 22, 2007

physics party 2007!!!

sooo my weekend was so lovely.

lets see...

friday night i dont remember what i did, but im sure it was something fun...i think i ate pei wei and watched LOST with annie which is no suprise at all...

saturday me and annie and cassie went to Cozymels in La Jolla and ate so much good food, and got this awesome margarita sampler...the blue one was so incredible.

then at night time, cassie was having a party with her friends from school (PS: cassie is a physics major at UCSD and it consumes her life) so me and annie bought some vodka, beeer, and coffe liquor and headed down to her casa is lajolla.
it was the most ridiculous party ever. but we had so much fun.

EVERYONE was a physics or sciency major, and hi my name is esther and im a friggen ART major and annie isnt even in college. haha...not to mention these people are so socially awkward so the conversation lacked common subject matter as well as good communication skills. and it was kinda like an unfortunate looking people convention. of course the drinks helped us to be able to laugh at the situation and of course annie kissed one of the more unattractive, arrogant, and awkward ones. their was like 3 to 1 amount of boys and not one of them were pretty.

but it was so fun! we just laughed and laughed at the situation and the snippets on conversation we'd catch. it was nice to spend time with cassie in her life there too. i miss her...

yesterday i wasnt feeling good (not a hangover, just not feeling too good in other areas) so slept most of the day and read my new book that finally came in the mail. annie came during her break and took a nap with me then too...then i went to church with cassie and it was sooo wonderful. i loved spending time with her again and church was soooo good! i just love my church, its everything i was looking for and they continue to suprise me with more and more things i didnt even realize i was looking for. and mark is so smart and i just love hearing him, i learn something new every week and feel challenged, which is hard to find in stuffy so cal. calvary chapels kick ass.

me and cassie maybe want to volunteer at their homeless people mission once a month. i got a bag to donate things...i need to donate things, i have more then enough crap.

but homeless people stress me out. im not gifted with them like other people are...im awesome with kids and teens tho...i miss them a lot, but have no time to commit which is why me and cassie liked the once a month deal.

after church annie came and watched the devil wears prada with me. i actually liked it! i really like anne hathaway and meryl streep so that helped. people in fashion annoy me, get over urself. but that was kinda the theme of the movie so i liked it.

ok, thats all.

im at work and should prob work. plus i have to pee.

Friday, January 19, 2007

survey for my fun friday night

my new computers internet wont work.
im annoyed.
annie and cassie came over and we watched "In Her Shoes" and i actually liked it! even tho im not a huge fan of cameron diaz...

and now a survey until cassie wakes up and i go to bed for the night!


1.) Where were you when the ball dropped for 2007?
sleeping on an air mattress in my houses "office" yeah...sucked

2.) How did you get the idea for your myspace name?
i dunno...its who i am...

3.) Do you like anyone?

4.) Has the death of a celebrity ever made you cry?
when princess diana died i cried...i was so young then, wow that was a long time ago. no one else tho.

5.) Have you ever been to a zoo?
yeah, but i like the wild animal park better

6.) Do you live in a zoo?
2 dogs, one wears a diaper, 2 fish, and a snake. YES

7.) What did you do this morning?
my alarm didnt go off for work, but luckily i only take 10min to get ready if necessary and my lovely dog bella woke me up just in time! shes the best

8.) Who are more complicated guys or girls?
girls are ridiculous...we're all emotional and confusing and frustrated because we feel emotional and confusing and it just sucks. but we're everything boys arent in a good way too, so ha. God made us both to even things out, ones not better then the other. complicated is just a good word for it

9.) Have you ever done something malicious to someone as a revenge tactic?
hmm...i cant think of anything...prob not, im usually pretty nice

11.) What are the last two digits of your phone number?

12.) What was the last concert you attended?
me without u, too long ago

14.) What is the last movie you watched?
we just watched In Her shoes, and now the new willie wonka is on...its at the part where the tv kid is in the tv and the oompa loompas are singing the rock song...i feel like if i was on drugs this movie would kick, but i actually don kno

15.) What/who do you dislike at the moment?
like i would really put that here...theirs some evil boys in me and my friends life who can be on the list. boys, just be honost with us and quit f-ing around.

16.) What food do you crave right now?
i had whole wheat pasta and pesto for dinner so i am quite happy thank u!

17.) Did you dream last night?
yeah, but i never remember them

18.) What was the last TV show you watched?
what not to wear...it was that 5-7 period where nothings on, so yeah

19.) What is your favorite piece of jewelry?
my angel earrings from olivia

20.) Name someone on your Top 8 who is just like you?
id say a mix of my friends olivia and micah.

21.) What's the last thing you ate/drank?
the pasta and water

where did 22 and 23 go?

24.) Are you on any medication?

25.) What side of the bed do you sleep on?
whatever side the nightstand is on, bella sleeps on the other side

26.) What color shirt are you wearing?
black sweatshirt cause its so damn cold

27) What color is your razor?
pink obviously.

28.) What is your favorite frozen treat?
im really excited u just used the word treat! besides that, soy cookie ice cream or ben and jerrys oatmeal cookie ice cream. amazing!!!

29.)How many tattoos/piercings do you have?
tattoos come when i get married someday, husband has to look at me all the time so i think he should have a say
5 piercings. guess where.

30.) Whats your favorite store?
target. i suck at life.

31.) Are you thirsty right now?
i could always tap a diet coke

32.) Can you imagine yourself ever getting married?
its going to be so wonderful! when the time is right.

33.) Who's someone you haven't seen in a while and miss?
tooo many people...my india family, my titis, my cousins, olivia, micah, tisha, cammie, joejoe, annemarie...we could be here all night

34.) What did you do last night?
hung out with bella and annie like usual.

35.) Do you care what people think about you?
i try not too, its a daily struggle tho of course

36.) Have you ever done something to instigate trouble?
no, i don like conflict or people mad at me or competition so yeah

37) Do you like your nose?

38.) What color are your bedroom walls?
blood red. haha that sounds more hardcore then it is

39.) Do you like giving or getting massages more?
i looove getting massages and scratchies!

40.) Have you ever snooped around your parents room before?
when i was little i liked to look at my moms jewelry and purfume and makeup and stuff...haha i was silly

42.) Where do you live?
socal, i don fit in

43.) What is your favorite city in the US/world?
Florence, Italy

44.) Who do you have a crush on?
why do surveys put these questions on them?

45.) Do you like the person who posted this last?
yes, i got it from brittany sara, i miss her

46.) Do you know their Birthday?
nope, and i don think shed care

47.) What is your favorite thing to do on a Friday night?
go out to a semi nice dinner kinda dressed up...a good movie...then get a drink...then chill at home and laugh and talk and drink more;)

48.) Do you tend to attract the stalker-type?
i dont attract any type, i suck at life remember?

49.) What do you smell like right now?
prob gross since i didnt have time this morn to shower

50.) What is your favorite color?
black pink green sometimes blue

51.) Do you like mustard?
heck yes

52.) What do you tell yourself when times get hard?
Jesus loves me.

53.) Would you ever sky dive?

54.) What size bed do you sleep on?

55.) Do old people scare you or creep you out?
i love old people. except when they think u owe them something...

56.) Have you ever bid for something on ebay?
no, it stresses me out sooo much

57.) What do you think of Angelina Jolie being pregnant?
i don care, i don kno her or anything

58.) Do you enjoy giving hugs?

59.) Would you consider yourself to be fashionable?
sometimes...usually just weird...i just wear whats comfy and what i like

60.) Do you have any idea how to say 2006 in Swahili?
this is stupid

61.) Do you own any shows on DVD?
heck yes! LOST -ARRESTED DEVELOPMENT- THE OFFICE-newlyweds, viva la bam too

62.) Who is your favorite Friends character?
Phoebe is so great

63.) Does it annoy you when someone says they'll call but never does?
no, usually im the one who doesnt call cause im forgetful and mean

64.) What books, if any, have made you cry?
chronicles of narnia

65.) Do you ever feel guilty after eating meat?
this is why i only eat chicken and turkey. the other meats make me sad...and they make my tummy sad...so yeah.

Thursday, January 18, 2007

best day ever!

i didnt have much hope for a nice day today, but it was so lovely!
annie didnt have to work, and since shes my only friend here...its really exciting...

i had a doc appt at noon, and then met annie at our designated meal eating place Pei Wei for lunch...then we went for a walk on the beach...then we went to two art stores looking for some crafts to do (annies going to make a traveling scrap book...each girl does a few pages) and i already had some crafts to do at home so i just got a few frames for my collages and such...then we came home and have been watching season 1 of LOST ever since...and went to Chipotle for dinner...here now, on disk 4...ive already seen it of course, but its soooo good this time around again! i cant wait until Feb 7th...im such a nerd...i have a crush on Charlie, hes totally my type...

tomorrow i look forward to a long day at work. afterwards i dont know...always suprises...
i really wanna go see the painted veil, someone please come with me.

Wednesday, January 17, 2007

my first official post

thats my best friend Bella. she woos even the grumpiest old glout. (glout is my own word invention, te gusta?) i just though you might like to meet her.

well my dear friend machu inspired me to revamp my old blog that i never really used. we'll see how it goes. ive had blogs before but after awhile i got to busy and bored with them. so here i am now...and it intrigues me that u care about my life enough to even glance at this silly lil thing.

lets see.
i start my final semester of community college on monday. my classes shouldnt be as stressful as in the past. lets see...math for elementary school teacher, art, literature, child psycology, and an earth science class online.

i work for apple computers. (i know, im awesome) and i get a new macbook tomorrow! woot! im excited cause im on this ol powerbook G4 and all the other people who work my job already got macbooks...im the last one for some odd reason. so that will be fun, transferring files...playing with the built in camera and such...

i also work as a receptionist on fridays for an executive office building. the girl who works M-TH got fired so im trying to get my dear friend annie the job. she'd be really good at it.

today i went to Henrys with my mommy and can we discuss how disgusting the meat counter is. i had to leave...it grossed me out. come on people, do u realize what ur eating?! disgusting.

im listening to Owen, which i havent in awhile...i forgot how much i loved him. actually, i listened to him so much that i had to take a break...its been like a year. one time i got to see him play before Me Without You...and i got to talk to him, hes real pretty.

im kinda lonely.
all my friends are off and away being busy.
ill be to busy for life starting monday tho, but until then im all alone. sad face.

i wanna go to disneyland. i got a pass for christmas, but no one will go with me. my life sucks.

all my love.