Apparently

Ive been working really hard on my Encinitas substitute application. I downloaded it from the internet, copied a million documents they ask for, and had it all ready to go take to them today.

Being a substitute was my back up plan in case I didn't find a permanent teaching position or found a legit nannying or tutoring job. So Im on my way and called to make sure someone would be there to take my application (they go through and check to make sure the million papers are all signed and filled out correctly) and the "nice" lady on the phone informs me that they have a freeze on their substitute pool and aren't taking applications while they try and clean it out. She said to try again September 1st and they might have some openings.

YOUR WEBSITE DIDNT SAY ANYTHING ABOUT THIS.

I hate you.

and freaking Carlsbad STILL hasn't approved my sub application.

ARG.

It was my BACKUP plan. I don't even really want to sub but was just going to try and do some to get into a district.
BACKUP PLAN.

So I cried a lot. And left the boy a message yelling and cursing about it. I NEVER yell. It was weird. Looking for a job is already so draining and difficult...then when you top it off with an economy of SUCK...your pretty much screwed. But I'm still trying. Applied for 3 more jobs today...

One of the jobs I applied for being a nanny in Dana Point called me 10 minutes later because it ended up being a pretty legit agency. She was really interested and said she called me because she was so impressed with my website:) (It worked!). She did a little interview right then and had me send her references. She said the next step was she'll check my references...do an in person interview...then I interview with the family. It definitely made me feel better after the substitute disaster, but I don't have a lot of faith it will work out. None of my other agencies have worked out. And the hours were weird but she said they were negotiable. see that, faith is GONE. I hate jobs.

ALSO
I was reading over my blog from when me and Number 2 first started dating and thought our first date entry was so cute so I emailed a copy to him just to be cute one day...
Here was our conversation that evening (to my HORRER)

me: did you get the little email I sent you?
Number 2: What email?
me: the one of my blog
Number 2: oh, yeah...but I've already read it
me: what? how? wait. WHAT?!
Number 2: yeah, I found your blog a long time ago
me: YOU NEVER MENTIONED IT?!

yeah, thats me. freaking out.
but then I read it back and was ok with it...and he didn't seem to mind too much. I kind of always write knowing he could possibly have found it...I mean...I don't hide it publicly.

But thats that. It was pretty clear it wasn't his favorite thing about me...haha. So just when you thought I was back.

ALSO
I had my first tutoring job today with the girls from my 4th grade class. So fun! Loved it! It felt really good to be teaching again...I miss it.

thats all for today.
lovelove.