Tuesday, March 06, 2012

First Comes Love...

Too bad I'd have to sharpie his little face and hands the night before our fictitious wedding.

Now, Mr. Boyfriend and I are both well aware that from the outside our relationship looks like two crazy people had a weird fling in Europe, now talk everyday for hours, and are in love? WHAT???

I know. He knows. In fact, sometimes we lie to people about our relationship just to avoid the judgement you think we can't see or hear in your voice. I get frustrated with people who feel like they have the right to have an opinion about us and how long we will last. I know I've mentioned this before, but being out of my culture, friend, and family circle...I realized how many kinds of relationships are out there. And how unfair it is of me to think people won't last just because they didn't "do it the right way". Who made up the right way? But with all of that being said, we do know we don't want to rush into things. We're trying to keep a sane head on...but its just really hard when you love each other so much you want to get married and start your life together tomorrow! Crazy kids.

However.

Last night he not only brought up again how I'm the girl of his dreams and he thinks I am the one he wants to spend the rest of his life with (I know, swoon) but also how he's been secretly saving money for our future life together and thats one of the reasons he hasn't been going out lately. Also why he hasn't been going out lately? He doesn't want to mess things up with us and would honestly rather be home skyping with me while we fall asleep looking at each other. Um. Did I just...wait, did I just transform an ex player by simply being myself? Did that just happen? Yes, yes it did happen. Its a miracle!

To be honest I still find myself waiting for him to cheat on me and break my heart no matter what he says. Which is horrible. I trust him...I do, but I am also trying to guard my heart a bit after all the crap I've gone through with men. And we have 6 more months of this distance. Well, only 2 until we see each other again so at least we get a break, 6 more months isn't horrible, but its still awhile. I don't think I'd worry about the cheating as much if he was in the states. I just know how the international community and Brazilians are, that matched with the long stretches of not seeing each other makes the physical sex need pretty horrible to say the least.

But I may have showed him the wedding venues I like...my wedding board on pinterest...and we picked out our colors. Among other things. Whats even better is that my behavior was encouraged by Mr. Boyfriend. So Yeah. We're awesome.

Everyday I just wake up so happy! And literally sing like Snow White as I go throughout my day because I feel like sunshine is coming out of every pore of my being!

Ok, enough nausea inducing lovey dovey for you today.

xoxo

HL

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