Friday, January 13, 2012


Well I managed this week pretty damn well, even though I couldn't figure out WHY I felt so shitty all week. I was soooooo tired, irritable, sore, and just had this general feeling of ickiness all week long. I still had a pretty good week with the kids I was subbing for, but ended up so snappy sometimes and couldn't figure out why.

And then it hit me.


1. dealing with a pretty bad UTI over here

2. was getting sick, with my fever last night and today and my swollen and sore throat (I know I know, the irony of me getting sick after only being back with the kids a week is NOT lost on me)

3. have freaking PMS! Which made not having carbs on my new stupid diet annnnnd not hearing from the boy and being PISSED about it so much more understandable! Plus explained the exhaustion, moodiness, and general soreness.

Had a good cry and nap when I got home and had just woken up and decided to mope when my boy finally called.

First words out of his mouth were, "Oh my God, its so good to hear your voice". All of his drama seems to have finally worked out and the baby is ok, he goes back to Brazil on Sunday. After I made sure he was ok I told him I was angry at him for not contacting me all week, and when he listed his excuses...which of course were semi legit...I still said they weren't good enough. Lost your phone? FIf you cared enough to talk to me you'd figure that shit out. But he was honest with me and said he was busy trying to get everything figured out and then when he wasn't doing that he was just sitting and being pissed off and upset about everything, which I know is how he deals with stuff. Last time he had serious stuff going on it took him a week to tell me about it, he's an avoider. When I told him this he was like shocked..." know me so well its like, scary". And yes, yes I do. I told him its not ok but quickly realized until we're in the same place long term there's not a real way we can work on this without it just being me freaking out and then nagging...and its not a deal breaker for me so it's ok for now.

However, my sane self was commended because of course he missed me and even gushed about our recent time together as being "amazing" so I gave myself a pat on the back for not entirely going down the crazy "he doesn't like me anymore!" route.

A lot of things to do and people to see this weekend, here's hoping I'm on the up and up!



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