Thursday, January 12, 2012

Surprise! Not A Psycho!


So my new "boyfriend" and I last spoke SATURDAY really briefly because he had the baby that day and then his temp phone expired and he was supposed to go home Monday so why bother refilling? Understandable. Fine.

THEN I don't hear from him until a FB message on Tuesday, thinking it'd be a "I made it back to Brazil babe!" message, but apparently A LOT of shit has happened there and he won't be able to go back to Brazil for probably another week. Now, everything was super legit and he wrote me about it including a kind of, "Im so sorry you haven't heard from me! But everything is crazy! Here's a list!". So I was totally understanding. I mean, the list includes personal health issues...serious money issues...and even scary stuff with the baby taken in an ambulance to the hospital issue so I am totally understanding. But. Now it's almost Friday and I have still yet to get a phone call or any other messages. Not only does my skin crawl when I don't get to talk to him everyday like we normally do, but I am just plain worried about him and would like an update.

BUT guess whose keeping a low profile? Crazy Lady.

Thats right! Crazy lady in my head is NOT sounding off with the "you haven't heard from him?!? he doesn't like you anymore!!! panic mode!!!" siren. She tries to rear her ugly head sometimes but gets shut down pretty quickly. Either I have really become a grown up, gained confidence, or just finally trust that this one really does care about me even if he's busy. Probably a mix of all three. Aren't we so proud! The only issue I do have, is that- if he is going through so much right now, why isn't he talking to ME about it? We are each others "person". We talk about everything together, especially if we're going through something serious. We both do have other people we discuss things with...but didn't he just ask me to be his girl friend? Aren't I supposed to officially now be in the best friend zone too? I know he's a bit of an avoider when it comes to takes him forever to talk to me about serious that could just be it now. But either way I am super bothered. Plus it doesn't help that we spent 3 days together being extremely vulnerable with each other and then he just disappears....or that I am definitely PMSing...or that before he came and didn't have a phone he still managed to call me almost everyday from his parents house phone.

I messaged him Wednesday asking him to call me when he had a chance because I miss him. We'll see how long it takes him and how much more mad I can get.

Managed to come home from work with a sore throat and fever! Back to work with children 4 days and already sick again, how am I a real person.



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