What Is This Feeling?

"What is this feeling? So sudden...and new?" -Wicked


I know some of you have been left wondering how dinner with PAG went the other night...
I was SO nervous going into it, I didn't even know if I was going to be able to eat because my stomach was so anxious. But as soon as we saw each other...it was easy. We had an amazing dinner catching up and 3rd question in from him is "So do you have a boyfriend back there now?" to which I honestly told him I'd been dating but couldn't find anything serious because everyone was there temporarily and it was difficult. He told me he'd been dating too, but nothing serious also. After a perfect dinner he asked if I wanted to see a movie too, so he looked up the movie times and we laughed our asses off watching Horrible Bosses and snuggling. He held my hand...and then kissed me a few times. And it was extra cute because it was where we had our first date...then we kissed outside by my car which was where we had our first kiss in the rain so many months ago. So precious you want to throw up, I know.

He asked what else I had to do that evening or morning...I said nothing...want to come over and wish me good night? And away we went...into a night of more perfection. Still no sex, because we actually like each other, hehe...but snuggling and some quality messing around may have been involved into the wee hours of the morning. You get ONE intimate detail about this one,
"I missed your kisses"
was said to me quite a few times, and every time made me swoon. Other precious things were said too, but they are all secrets I get to keep for now.

In the morning he let me sleep while he got ready for work then woke me up with kisses and snuggles because his guest house isn't situated so I can leave easily without him. On the way out he kissed me more and more and saw my flat tires and said "I'll fix those for you"...so everything was lovely. Really lovely.

Yesterday I got a morning text "Thanks, sorry for the early wake up". And later when I texted him how his day was going, I didn't get a response until hours later and all it said was "good n tired lol". I know he's extremely busy with work right now, I could tell he was a bit stressed out and I kept him awake so he got very little sleep, but I guess I was hoping for more then that. In the past he was VERY attentive and sweet, and now he's just being more distant all of a sudden. Which only confuses me because during our actual evening together, neither of us were distant.

So we have no more plans yet to see each other. We didn't talk about anything serious during the course of the evening. And needless to say, I'm all stressed out about it.

This feeling is so unfamiliar though! These past months with all of my Euro lovers I didn't care if they called or not...I mean, I did but I didn't stress about it. It was more of a "They better call or they can kiss my ass" attitude (I know, such girl power) and now I'm all anxious and stressed out over this one. What is this feeling? So sudden...and new? I think I might ACTUALLY like this one.

FAIL Lady. First step with boys is to not care and not get anxious about it. Boo me.